DARWIN AWARDS

Socrtease

Socrtease

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EIGHTH PLACE
In Detroit, a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide sewer grate to retrieve his car keys.

SEVENTH PLACE
A 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker, who 'totally zoned when he ran,' accidentally, jogged off a 100-foot high cliff on his daily run.

SIXTH PLACE
While at the beach, Daniel Jones, 21, dug an 8 foot hole for protection from the wind and had been sitting in a beach chair at the bottom! When it t collapsed, burying him beneath 5 feet of sand. People on the beach used their hands and shovels trying to get him out but could not reach him. It took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an hour to free him. Jones was pronounced dead at a hospital.

FIFTH PLACE
Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed as he fell through the ceiling of a bicycle shop he was burglarizing. Death was caused when the long flashlight he had placed in his mouth to keep his hands free rammed into the base of his skull as he hit the floor.
 
FOURTH PLACE
Sylvester Briddell, Jr., 26, was killed as he won a bet with friends who said he would not put a revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth and pull the trigger.

THIRD PLACE
After stepping around a marked police patrol car parked at the front door, a man walked into H&J Leather & Firearms intent on robbing the store. The shop was full of customers and a uniformed officer was standing at the counter. Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber announced a hold-up and fired a few wild shots from a target pistol. The officer and a clerk promptly returned fire, and several customers also drew their guns and fired. The robber was pronounced dead at the scene by Paramedics. Crime scene investigators located 47 expended cartridge cases in the shop. The subsequent autopsy revealed 23 gunshot wounds. Ballistics identified rounds from 7 different weapons. No one else was hurt.

HONOURABLE MENTION
Paul Stiller, 47, and his wife Bonnie were bored just driving around at 2 A.M. so they lit a quarter stick of dynamite to toss out the window to see what would happen. Apparently they failed to notice the window was closed.
 
RUNNER UP
Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several friends when one of them said they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from a local bridge in the middle of traffic. The conversation grew more heated and at least 10 men trooped along the walkway of the bridge at 4:30 AM. Upon arrival at the midpoint of the bridge they discovered that no one had brought a bungee rope. Bingham, who had continued drinking, volunteered and pointed out that a coil of lineman's cable, lay near by. They secured one end around Bingham's leg and then tied the other 1 to the bridge. His fall lasted 40 feet before the cable tightened and tore his foot off at the ankle. Bingham's foot was never located.

AND THE WINNER IS...
A zookeeper fed his constipated elephant 22 doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of berries, figs and prunes before the plugged-up pachyderm finally got relief. Investigators say the ill-fated keeper was attempting to give the ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the relieved beast unloaded. The sheer force of the elephant's unexpected defecation knocked him to the ground where he struck his head on a rock as the elephant continued to evacuate 200 pounds of dung on top of him. It seems to be just one of those freak accidents that proves... 'shit happens'.
 
Darla said:
Come on , are these true?
Click to expand...

Yes.

Here's one of my favorites:

http://www.darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin2000-04.html

Gun Safety Training
2000 Darwin Award Runner-Up
Confirmed True by Darwin
(28 February 2000, Texas) A Houston man earned a succinct lesson in gun safety when he played Russian roulette with a .45-caliber semiautomatic pistol. Rashaad, nineteen, was visiting friends when he announced his intention to play the deadly game. He apparently did not realize that a semiautomatic pistol, unlike a revolver, automatically inserts a cartridge into the firing chamber when the gun is cocked. His chance of winning a round of Russian roulette was zero, as he quickly discovered.
 
They are all pretty bad.......its so hard to decide which one is the stupidest.
 
LadyT said:
They are all pretty bad.......its so hard to decide which one is the stupidest.
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I agree, LadyT. Except I don't think the winner was stupid, as much as incredibly unlucky. The rest are justified in being on the Darwin Awards list.
 
It turns out, the elephant one may be an urban legend.

Haven't found anything on the rest.
 
Darla said:
Come on , are these true?
Click to expand...

Some are true and some are myths.

The Darwin Award candidate who tied his patio chair to weather balloons and went air borne is a true story (though technically he wasn't eligible for the Darwin Award as he actually survived).

The story of the man who bolted a JATO (Jet Assisted Take Off) device to his 68 Chevy Impala and fired it off on an rural Arizona highway is not true. That's an internet myth. Made one hell of a good story though.

My favorite Darwin award winner was the young Florida woman who accidently backed her Mercedes off a pier into the ocean. She then, in panic, called 911, who instructed her to roll down the window to equalize the pressure in the car and then to swim out. She screamed in terror "But I'll get wet!". She subsequently drowned. When they pulled the car out of the ocean it was also noted that the rear window was down....and yes...she was blonde!
 
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