“When the wife does not focus in on the needs and the feelings, sexually, personally, to make him feel like a man, to make him feel like a success, to make him feel like her hero, he’s very susceptible to the charm of some other woman making him feel what he needs,”
Dr. Laura is correct... IF the man is weak and doesn't have the moxie to pry himself away from the "some other woman".
That doesn't make it his wife's fault... far from it. But it unfortunately puts her in the position of being the only one who can save the situation, even when it's not her fault. And Dr. Laura's description is what she needs to do in that case. UNLESS she decides to simply boot the louse out, which is another viable option.
But what Dr. Laura said, applies BEFORE the milquetoast starts seeing other women. Once he starts doing that, the hole is in the Titanic's hull, and possible courses of action become extremely limited.
When a woman marries a man, she should make it her hobby to do what Dr. Laura said above. Partly because it's nice to do that with someone you love, and partly to make sure he never strays. And at the same time, the man must do that for her too, for exactly the same reasons.
Men aren't the only ones with needs, they aren't the only ones who can stray, women are just as human as men are and they can be just as weak and temptation-prone as men can be. What Dr. Laura said above, applies equally to both sides of a marriage. If both spouses don't work pretty hard at doing what she said, trouble will be on the horizon, because temptations are everywhere. The trouble can be as much (or more) the fault of the philanderer, more than the fault of the wronged spouse. But sometimes the wronged spouse can be the one at fault, if he/she is indifferent, abusive, etc. to the other.
What Dr. Laura was saying IMHO, is that even if Spitzer's wife wasn't at fault, she is unfortunately the only one in a position to prevent a weak spouse from straying, by doing the things she (Dr. laura) said long before any straying occurs.
Now that Spitzer has strayed (huge!), it will be EXTREMELY difficult for them to patch it up. The hole is in the Titanic's hull, bigtime. There might be only one choice left to her. They will both need tremendous fortitude to patch it up... something Spitzer hasn't shown much of to date.
