The obligations of a neighbor

H

Hawkeye10

ButterMilk Man
Contributor
Let us say that you are walking near your home evening/night , it is your subdivision or a couple of blocks away, and a car in the driveway has lights on that likely will drain the battery. Do you go knock on the door to warn them, to help them out, hoping that someone would do you the same.

Last night at around 11 three houses down someone had not the main exterior lights on but the secondary. I saw no lights on inside and figured everyone was asleep and did not seriously consider waking them. They almost certainly had a dead battery in the morning. I wondered how many had seen the situation earlier and decided to do nothing.

Tonight at around 10 a work van (we have a ton of worker bees in the neighborhood, those guys who get up early and come to work with a truck often loaded with gear) with interiors on. There were lights on in the house so I knocked and backed up (I had my hound, that is way were were there, it was walk the hound time). After forever a guy open up just a little and peered out. When I told him about the light he was instantly chill and said Thank You. A bit later he came out to deal with it as I was way down the street and yelled extensive Thank You's again, saying that the battery is a real bitch to get to,




I had to think about going to the door, about if it was a good idea, is there going to be a gun, was I going to get yelled at, what was my duty....

This left me feeling sad, that I have gotten this way, that I too have had my fear ramped up as I watch my country decay.




Thoughts?
 
Guille said:
You're a pussy. That's my problem. You actually had to post a thread begging people to tell you to do the right thing? What the fuck is wrong with you?
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Who are you to say what is and isn't the right thing to do?
 
Hawkeye10 said:
Let us say that you are walking near your home evening/night , it is your subdivision or a couple of blocks away, and a car in the driveway has lights on that likely will drain the battery. Do you go knock on the door to warn them, to help them out, hoping that someone would do you the same.

Last night at around 11 three houses down someone had not the main exterior lights on but the secondary. I saw no lights on inside and figured everyone was asleep and did not seriously consider waking them. They almost certainly had a dead battery in the morning. I wondered how many had seen the situation earlier and decided to do nothing.

Tonight at around 10 a work van (we have a ton of worker bees in the neighborhood, those guys who get up early and come to work with a truck often loaded with gear) with interiors on. There were lights on in the house so I knocked and backed up (I had my hound, that is way were were there, it was walk the hound time). After forever a guy open up just a little and peered out. When I told him about the light he was instantly chill and said Thank You. A bit later he came out to deal with it as I was way down the street and yelled extensive Thank You's again, saying that the battery is a real bitch to get to,




I had to think about going to the door, about if it was a good idea, is there going to be a gun, was I going to get yelled at, what was my duty....

This left me feeling sad, that I have gotten this way, that I too have had my fear ramped up as I watch my country decay.




Thoughts?
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What kind of a Neighborhood do you live in that you are afraid to knock on your neighbor's door?
 
Jack said:
What kind of a Neighborhood do you live in that you are afraid to knock on your neighbor's door?
Click to expand...

I dispute that I am afraid to knock on a door....I never said that I was afraid, I said that thoughts went through my head and that I am wondering why no one told the people two days ago as I very much suspect that people noticed earlier in the evening but did nothing.

It is a very diverse but broken neighborhood....the HOA is non functioning, people generally dont know each other nor do they act like they want to. There is very little of kids playing outside together or even people being outside other than in their back yards (fenced) unless they have a dog to walk or a yard to mow. I talk to people as I walk my dog but that almost makes me a freak. Most of us have nice covered front porches but they are rarely used.
 
Hawkeye10 said:
I dispute that I am afraid to knock on a door....I never said that I was afraid, I said that thoughts went through my head and that I am wondering why no one told the people two days ago as I very much suspect that people noticed earlier in the evening but did nothing.

It is a very diverse but broken neighborhood....the HOA is non functioning, people generally dont know each other nor do they act like they want to. There is very little of kids playing outside together or even people being outside other than in their back yards (fenced) unless they have a dog to walk or a yard to mow. I talk to people as I walk my dog but that almost makes me a freak. Most of us have nice covered front porches but they are rarely used.
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It seems the 'neighborly' thing to do is tell someone they left their lights on. I don't know about walking up to someone's door with a dog though.
I think saying 'Hi' or waving as you pass people lets them know you are friendly. Rather than 'What you looking at, Mother Fucker!'. (just an opinion)
 
Is the person a leftist or a an American patriot?

If a leftist then fuck em. They deserve no quarter and no help. I wouldn’t piss on a leftist if she were on fire
 
Jack said:
It seems the 'neighborly' thing to do is tell someone they left their lights on. I don't know about walking up to someone's door with a dog though.
I think saying 'Hi' or waving as you pass people lets them know you are friendly. Rather than 'What you looking at, Mother Fucker!'. (just an opinion)
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That is why I backed way up. No seriously around here you dont know what kind of reaction that you will get knocking on a door....people are suspicious....quite a few have No Soliciting signs which some have told me dont mean dont knock if you are selling something, they mean dont knock at all unless you have been invited or are friends and family. Then too some barely speak english.
 
Joe Hiden said:
Is the person a leftist or a an American patriot?

If a leftist then fuck em. They deserve no quarter and no help. I wouldn’t piss on a leftist if she were on fire
Click to expand...

I am not like that but politics seems to be on the down low, people here dont advertise their politics generally, not even on their cars.
 
Always let them know;) Get to know your neighbors...then you won't have to even think about it;)
 
Hawkeye10 said:
Let us say that you are walking near your home evening/night , it is your subdivision or a couple of blocks away, and a car in the driveway has lights on that likely will drain the battery. Do you go knock on the door to warn them, to help them out, hoping that someone would do you the same.

Last night at around 11 three houses down someone had not the main exterior lights on but the secondary. I saw no lights on inside and figured everyone was asleep and did not seriously consider waking them. They almost certainly had a dead battery in the morning. I wondered how many had seen the situation earlier and decided to do nothing.

Tonight at around 10 a work van (we have a ton of worker bees in the neighborhood, those guys who get up early and come to work with a truck often loaded with gear) with interiors on. There were lights on in the house so I knocked and backed up (I had my hound, that is way were were there, it was walk the hound time). After forever a guy open up just a little and peered out. When I told him about the light he was instantly chill and said Thank You. A bit later he came out to deal with it as I was way down the street and yelled extensive Thank You's again, saying that the battery is a real bitch to get to,




I had to think about going to the door, about if it was a good idea, is there going to be a gun, was I going to get yelled at, what was my duty....

This left me feeling sad, that I have gotten this way, that I too have had my fear ramped up as I watch my country decay.




Thoughts?
Click to expand...

You did the correct thing, Hawk.

There are many places where walking up to the door at night could get you shot.

Going up to the door when there were no lights on in the house would have been the wrong thing to do.

The assholes giving you a tough time about this are...well, assholes. Pay them no mind.
 
I would always let them know. But then a female at your door at night is probably a lot less scary than a male at your door. If your neighborhood is that scary, a woman probably wouldn't be out after dark even with her dog.
 
Frank Apisa said:
You did the correct thing, Hawk.

There are many places where walking up to the door at night could get you shot.

Going up to the door when there were no lights on in the house would have been the wrong thing to do.

The assholes giving you a tough time about this are...well, assholes. Pay them no mind.
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Do you have neighbors who are neighborly? Do you live in a neighborhood? This situation where I am is so depressing, people living near or next to each other who dont know each other, and seem to not want to. Just for reference I grew up expecting block parties once a year, where the ladies of a couple of blocks had a monthly coffee.

Part of the problem here is that we have a very high rental rate, something around 1/3.
 
NiftyNiblick said:
When was the last time anybody had a car whose lights didn't automatically go on and off by themselves?
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There are a lot of 15-20 year olds still on the road that dont have that feature but even my wifes 09 jeep has an interior light that if you turn it on in a certain way will not turn off on its own, which was done on purpose in case someone wanted steady light with the vehicle turned off.
 
Hawkeye10 said:
Do you have neighbors who are neighborly? Do you live in a neighborhood? This situation where I am is so depressing, people living near or next to each other who dont know each other, and seem to not want to. Just for reference I grew up expecting block parties once a year, where the ladies of a couple of blocks had a monthly coffee.

Part of the problem here is that we have a very high rental rate, something around 1/3.
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That could contribute to it some. Plus in middle-class urban areas, ppl just don't socialize with people outside of family, friends, and coworkers. Before moving up here to the Frozen North, I lived with Mr. Owl in an urban-suburban place. The population density there is 3,200 ppl per square mile (think small lots). Here, it is 3.3 ppl for square mile. But I digress.

When I moved there I was interested in who the neighbors were. The only person that Mr. Owl spoke to or knew the name of was one of the next-door neighbors. He only knew her name because her dog ran away and he helped her find him. He had no idea who lived in the other homes. It was such an alien concept to me. He went to work, came home, didn't talk to ppl. Yet he bought that home because he wanted to live closely packed with others. Isn't that odd?

Like you, I grew up in an area where ppl socialized. So I started talking to them, over the fence. Next door. Down the street. Turns out that they were just as interested in who lived by them as I was with them.

So I'd say, do more than just say hi. Talk to them. Share a bit about yourself. This is a lot easier for a woman to do than for a man. We're more social, for one thing. And ppl are more likely to trust a woman stranger over a man. Does your wife enjoy socializing? Maybe she could help break the ice.

Like I said, we now live in a sparsely-populated area. There are maybe 13 families on our two-mile road. We can't even see each other's houses. But we know each other's names and we know if one of us is in trouble, the others will be right there. Plus we have some fantastic bonfire get-togethers. Maybe the difference is here we know we might need help from our neighbors. In an urban area, ppl count on help from public safety ppl.
 
Hawkeye10 said:
That is why I backed way up. No seriously around here you dont know what kind of reaction that you will get knocking on a door....people are suspicious....quite a few have No Soliciting signs which some have told me dont mean dont knock if you are selling something, they mean dont knock at all unless you have been invited or are friends and family. Then too some barely speak english.
Click to expand...

Well, you can set the tone of what the Neighborhood should be like ... 'friendly'.
 
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