FUCK THE POLICE
911 EVERY DAY
First you have to throw in some populist rant about how irresponsible and greedy wall street investors are and how everyone deserves fire and brimstone. Then you need to say that our economy is "potentially in unsound shape" and that we need to "shore it up". Then you need to wholeheartedly embrace the seven hundred billion dollar deal, and hope everyone thinks the first part makes people think you really care about them, and no one notices that you contradict yourself constantly, always predict disaster and promise change, while neither ever happens.