What Can True Christians™ Do to Help Speed Up Global Warming So Jesus Comes Back Quicker?
I'm going to get a little controversial now, but someone has to speak the truth. The sissy Christians who pick and choose whatever Bible verse they like to fit their latest agenda will burn in Hell and give off just as pleasing a scent to the nostrils of the Lord as any hell bound, America hating Muslim will. It is these pansy, false Christians whose liberal ideas are polluting the spiritual truth of God's Word. I'll say it now, and I'll say it again and again! If you are a True Christian™, you shouldn't be recycling. True Christians™ shouldn't be attending Global Warming rallies, or be celebrating Earth Day. True Christians™ understand that worrying about such things, or supporting such efforts is in direct conflict with the Word of God! Friends, we can sum up our Evangelical stand on "Conservation" by making all these fancy scientifical types understand one truth: That is if Jesus can feed five thousand people with two stinky fish and five loaves of stale bread, He can certainly turn the lights back on and make clean air by just burping! Oh, Glory! Glory!
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/2008/april/conservationsin.html
Science Doesn't Make Any Sense!
Today's scientists have taken a turn for the worse. Their mysterious campaign of deception was no doubt designed by several demons of the highest order, armed with Al Gore's calculator and more than likely orchestrated by the hoofed satyr, Lucifer, himself. Science is a "fuzzy math" and a blood-bought Baptist must have a spirit of discernment to see through secular science's toxic cloud of confusion. They mislead the public by creating different names for themselves. They say, "I'm a psychologist," or "I'm a therapist or microbiologist." Poppy-cock! That's what it is. They are nothing more than Satanists with spectacles and pockets full of pencils and rulers. In fact, the word "scientist" is actually Latin for "Satanist." Do they take Christians for fools?
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news1100/science.html