The Anonymous
Bag On My Head
A Pittsburgh judge is upholding the eviction of Christiefan and [redacted] after a house cat identified as the legal homeowner.
“We are pleased that the judge respects Pumpkin’s lived experience,” the cat’s lawyer said in front of the courthouse. “That house is all his, especially the bed and sunny spot on the upstairs floor. I personally believe Christiefan and [redacted] are fine people, but Pumpkin would like the world to know they never once met his expectations.”
While the ruling was eventually in the cat’s favor, there was a bit of an awkward moment when, as soon as the judge gave him the house, Pumpkin acted like he didn’t want it anymore.
“Oh…Ok, so now you don’t want the home? Well, in that case, I’ll—” the judge said before seeing Pumpkin seemed to change his mind and wanted the deed after all.
This back-and-forth went on for several minutes and, even after awarded the property, Pumpkin was still clearly annoyed.
Update: After one long, quiet afternoon of sleeping, Pumpkin has reluctantly allowed Christiefan and [redacted] to move back in as renters. They will work tirelessly to win Pumpkin’s approval–which the cat has made clear is impossible. As part of their renter’s agreement, Christiefan and [redacted] will be allowed to scratch under his chin, but Pumpkin retains the right to randomly bite their fingers regardless of how much he enjoys it.
https://thegloriousamerican.com/featured/family-evicted-after-house-cat-identifies-as-home-owner/
