cancel2 2022
Canceled
Grind was walking down the street, when all of a sudden, he hears a small croaky voice from down left below, "HELP! HELP ME!"
He stops, looks down and sees this frog sitting on a rock.
"Help me!" the frog cries feebly. "I'm an enchanted princess! An evil wizard turned me into a frog! HELP! Kiss me, quick, and turn me back!"
The guy picks up the frog, puts it in his shirt pocket, walks on.
The frog struggles and climbs up enough to get its head out and starts up again, "Didn't you hear what I said? I'm a princess! I'm totally beautiful! And I'll do ANYTHING - yes, ANYTHING! - for as long as you want and as hard as you want forever if you just kiss me and turn me back!"
The guy just stuffs the frog back down the shirt pocket.
Muffled, the frog cries, "What's the matter with you? Didn't you hear what I said?!"
The guy says, "I am a computer programmer.
"I have no need for women.
"But a talking frog?
"WAAAAY COOL!!!!"
A farmer is out in the middle of a barren hillside, tending to his sheep, when suddenly a black Range Rover comes hurtling towards him. It stops, and a man dressed impeccably in an Italian suit and wearing designer sunglasses gets out.
“If I can tell you how many sheep you have here,” he asks, “can I have one of them?”
The farmer replies “I suppose so.”
The man reaches into his car and pulls out a GPS receiver and laptop, connects it to a satellite phone, and logs onto the internet. He immediately goes to the NASA website, logs into the satellite page, uploads his current latitude and longitude and requests a high resolution thermal satellite image with 20cm resolution. He then runs the image through image processing software which counts all the heat sources. Subtracting two, for himself and the farmer, he proudly announces that there were 483 animals on the hillside.
“That’s correct” replies the farmer, to which the man lifts the nearest animal and places it in the back of his Range Rover.
The farmer then asks “If I can tell you what you do for a living, can I have it back?” The man agrees, and the farmer announces with confidence that he’s an IT Consultant.
“How did you know that?” he asked.
“Simple really,” replies the farmer. “You arrive here without being asked, try to impress me with the latest must-have technology, only to give me the answer to a question which I already knew. More importantly you know absolutely nothing about my business. Now….can I please have my dog back?”
He stops, looks down and sees this frog sitting on a rock.
"Help me!" the frog cries feebly. "I'm an enchanted princess! An evil wizard turned me into a frog! HELP! Kiss me, quick, and turn me back!"
The guy picks up the frog, puts it in his shirt pocket, walks on.
The frog struggles and climbs up enough to get its head out and starts up again, "Didn't you hear what I said? I'm a princess! I'm totally beautiful! And I'll do ANYTHING - yes, ANYTHING! - for as long as you want and as hard as you want forever if you just kiss me and turn me back!"
The guy just stuffs the frog back down the shirt pocket.
Muffled, the frog cries, "What's the matter with you? Didn't you hear what I said?!"
The guy says, "I am a computer programmer.
"I have no need for women.
"But a talking frog?
"WAAAAY COOL!!!!"
A farmer is out in the middle of a barren hillside, tending to his sheep, when suddenly a black Range Rover comes hurtling towards him. It stops, and a man dressed impeccably in an Italian suit and wearing designer sunglasses gets out.
“If I can tell you how many sheep you have here,” he asks, “can I have one of them?”
The farmer replies “I suppose so.”
The man reaches into his car and pulls out a GPS receiver and laptop, connects it to a satellite phone, and logs onto the internet. He immediately goes to the NASA website, logs into the satellite page, uploads his current latitude and longitude and requests a high resolution thermal satellite image with 20cm resolution. He then runs the image through image processing software which counts all the heat sources. Subtracting two, for himself and the farmer, he proudly announces that there were 483 animals on the hillside.
“That’s correct” replies the farmer, to which the man lifts the nearest animal and places it in the back of his Range Rover.
The farmer then asks “If I can tell you what you do for a living, can I have it back?” The man agrees, and the farmer announces with confidence that he’s an IT Consultant.
“How did you know that?” he asked.
“Simple really,” replies the farmer. “You arrive here without being asked, try to impress me with the latest must-have technology, only to give me the answer to a question which I already knew. More importantly you know absolutely nothing about my business. Now….can I please have my dog back?”
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