Schools 1957 v 2008

Damocles

Accedo!
Staff member
Scenario:
Jack goes quail hunting before school, pulls into school parking lot with shotgun in gun rack.
1957 -
Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack's shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.
2008 - School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.

Scenario:
Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.
1957 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.
2008 - Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.

Scenario:
Jeffrey won't be still in class, disrupts other students.
1957 - Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by the Principal. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.
2008 - Jeffrey given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADD. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a disability.

Scenario:
Billy breaks a window in his neighbor's car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.
1957 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.
2008 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist tells Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has affair with psychologist.

Scenario:
Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.
1957 - Mark shares aspirin with Principal out on the smoking dock.
2008 - Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.

Scenario:
Pedro fails high school English.
1957 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college
2008 - Pedro's cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.

Scenario:
Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, and blows up a red ant bed.
1957 - Ants die.
2008- BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated; Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.

Scenario:
Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.
1957 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2008 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy.
 
1957 uscitizen goes out and carries in coal for the pot bellied stove heating his one room schoolhouse.

2008 they shut down school becuase the air conditioning quit.
 
Johnny is thirsty so he gets a drink from the water fountain

1957 - Johnny is lynched by Brady and the gang for drinking out of the white water fountain.

2008 - Johnny's thirst is quenched.
 
It just wasn't funny. I was hoping it would be something good.
It was an e-mail what do you expect? I figured people would add their own thing to make it funnier.

If you think it is just too much of an effort to get in a good mood... :dunno:
 
It was an e-mail what do you expect? I figured people would add their own thing to make it funnier.

If you think it is just too much of an effort to get in a good mood... :dunno:

LOL.

You can never win can you? You fund a brand new site for everyone to come to and debate, you moderate, you update, you're fair and balanced, you try to add a little humor every now and then and then you get slammed.

No good deed goes unpunished.:p
 
Johnny is thirsty so he gets a drink from the water fountain

1957 - Johnny is lynched by Brady and the gang for drinking out of the white water fountain.

2008 - Johnny's thirst is quenched, but he soon dies from a chemical attack brought on by the city's handling of the water supply.

Fixed.
 
LOL.

You can never win can you? You fund a brand new site for everyone to come to and debate, you moderate, you update, you're fair and balanced, you try to add a little humor every now and then and then you get slammed.

No good deed goes unpunished.:p

Truer words were never spoken. Thanks Damocles.
 
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