Toilet Graffiti

C

cancel2 2022

Canceled
  • The best way to a man's heart is to saw his breast plate open. (Women's toilet, Murphy's, Champaign, IL)
  • Don't trust anything that bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die. (Men's toilet, Murphy's, Champaign, IL)
  • Beauty is only a light switch away. (Perkins Library, Duke University, Durham, North Carolina)
  • I've decided that to raise my grades I must lower my standards. (Houghton Library, Harvard University. Cambridge, Massachusetts)
  • Remember, it's not, "How high are you?" it's "Hi, how are you?" (Rest stop off Route 81. West Virginia.)
  • God made pot. Man made beer. Whom do you trust? (The Irish Times, Washington, DC)
  • Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. (The Bayou, Baton Rouge, Louisiana.)
  • No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her shit. (Men's toilet, Linda's Bar and Grill. Chapel Hill, North Carolina)
  • At the feast of ego, everyone leaves hungry. (Bentley's House of Coffee and Tea, Tucson, Arizona)
  • It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere. (Written in the dust on the back of a bus. Wickenburg, Arizona)
  • Make love, not war. -Hell, do both, get married! (Women's toilet, The Filling Station. Bozeman, Montana)
  • God is dead. -Nietzsche; Nietzsche is dead. -God (The Tombs Restaurant. Washington, DC)
  • If voting could really change things, it would be illegal. (Revolution Books. New York, New York)
  • A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tyres or testicles, you're going to have trouble with it. (Women's toilet, Dick's Last Resort. Dallas, Texas)
 
tom prendergast said:
  • The best way to a man's heart is to saw his breast plate open. (Women's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL)
  • Don't trust anything that bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die. (Men's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL)
  • Beauty is only a light switch away. (Perkins Library, Duke University, Durham, North Carolina)
  • I've decided that to raise my grades I must lower my standards. (Houghton Library, Harvard University. Cambridge, Massachusetts)
  • Remember, it's not, "How high are you?" it's "Hi, how are you?" (Rest stop off Route 81. West Virginia.)
  • God made pot. Man made beer. Whom do you trust? (The Irish Times, Washington, DC)
  • Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. (The Bayou, Baton Rouge, Louisiana.)
  • No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her shit. (Men's Room, Linda's Bar and Grill. Chapel Hill, North Carolina)
  • At the feast of ego, everyone leaves hungry. (Bentley's House of Coffee and Tea, Tucson, Arizona)
  • It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere. (Written in the dust on the back of a bus. Wickenburg, Arizona)
  • Make love, not war. -Hell, do both, get married! (Women's restroom, The Filling Station. Bozeman, Montana)
  • God is dead. -Nietzsche; Nietzsche is dead. -God (The Tombs Restaurant. Washington, DC)
  • If voting could really change things, it would be illegal. (Revolution Books. New York, New York)
  • A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tyres or testicles, you're going to have trouble with it. (Women's restroom, Dick's Last Resort. Dallas, Texas)
Click to expand...

I have seen some of these before, thanks for the giggles!
 
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
Click to expand...

The only way there will ever be peace is once I conquer the world and subjugate humanity to my own needs. This requires fighting, and there's nothing wrong with it. It is good to fight for me, knowing that in doing so, you shall be spared. If you are ever convicted of speeding, I may even commute your sentence to death.
 
The best way to a man's heart is just below his stomach.
High on the board: 'Too much sex stunts your growth.' Way down at the bottom of the board: 'Why didn't someone tell me?'
On the outside of a public building: This stone was laid by Councillor K Snufflebotham. Written underneath: 'Who the hell wants to screw a stone?'
Look down. You're peeing on your shoes.
 
"Vote for Nixon in '72/ don't change Dicks in the middle of a screw." High school boy's stall, 1972.
"Don't look here, the joke is in your hand." Wall above urinal.
"Those who write on bathroom walls/ roll their shit in little balls./ Those who read these words of wit/ eat those little balls of shit." High school stall.
 
A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tyres or testicles, you're going to have trouble with it. (Women's restroom, Dick's Last Resort. Dallas, Texas)

If this was in Texas you'd have read "tires" rather than "tyres" some brit wrote this up.
 
King of the Amphetamines said:
The only way there will ever be peace is once I conquer the world and subjugate humanity to my own needs. This requires fighting, and there's nothing wrong with it.
Click to expand...

We shall conquer the world together. I will be your loyal subject, until I double-cross you and my forces put you to death. But before that happens, I will rule by your side with an iron fist.
 
Damocles said:
A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tyres or testicles, you're going to have trouble with it. (Women's restroom, Dick's Last Resort. Dallas, Texas)

If this was in Texas you'd have read "tires" rather than "tyres" some brit wrote this up.
Click to expand...

That would presuppose everything written in Texas is written by a Texan. Thanks to the gift of aviation, uncouth British vandals have the ability to travel all across the globe defacing foreign toilet facilities.

Huzzah!
 
Damocles said:
A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tyres or testicles, you're going to have trouble with it. (Women's restroom, Dick's Last Resort. Dallas, Texas)

If this was in Texas you'd have read "tires" rather than "tyres" some brit wrote this up.
Click to expand...

That Brit was me, so bang goes your theory Sherlock.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top