Does Everyone Have The Nerve To Shoot a Gun?

Superfreak said:
My sisters did. Unfortunately my sister is now helping to hide the douche bag that has beaten on my niece. After everything she went through, I can't understand her thinking... she is going right back to the same 'he won't do it again' line of crap that she used with her ex.
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Not helping your niece?

Well that makes you a coward.

You need to resolve it or are you just going to wait until it's too late?

I mean, you don't just leave a woman in a situation where you fear for her life.
 
ZappasGuitar said:
Maybe you should ask SF.

He's the one condoning the kidnapping of that woman against HER OWN WISHES.

What if Howey tried to remove her from the house and she had him arrested for Kidnapping?
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I have never had to do deal with domestic violence however if it were my best friend it was happening to them I'd probably go to any lengths to help and if meant that I literally had to take her from her house, yes kidnap her, I wouldn't rule it out. I'd rather my best friend charge me with kidnapping than have her dead.
 
Rana said:
Howey, Superfreak and Cawacko are very lucky to never have had a friend or family member involved in domestic violence. It is a horrible situations for the abused and their friends and family. There are times when nothing anyone does can save them, other than killing the abuser. Then the victim had better make absolutely sure this was their only recourse because there are a lot of people in jail for shooting their abusers.
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It really made me think hard about bothering with all this. It is almost summer though, so. And Independence Day is coming, which I usually don't celebrate because I'm not religious, but this year I am thinking about it.
 
WinterBorn said:
Very true.

Many years ago I watched a drag queen beat the hell out of 3 rednecks harrassing her. It was hilarious.

This idea that every gay man is some flaming fem is laughable, and only shows the ignorance of the poster.
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Maybe Howey is a flaming fem maybe he isn't. I think what we can take away is he is too big a pussy to help his so called best friend.
 
Darla said:
It really made me think hard about bothering with all this. It is almost summer though, so. And Independence Day is coming, which I usually don't celebrate because I'm not religious, but this year I am thinking about it.
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considering independence day is when americans declared their interest to take their guns and kill off their tyrannical government, I am surprised so many liberals wish to partake in the festivities.
 
I Love America said:
Maybe Howey is a flaming fem maybe he isn't. I think what we can take away is he is too big a pussy to help his so called best friend.
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Unless she is willing to help herself, all Howey can do is risk being arrested for kidnapping or risk getting her beaten worse.

If someone else confronts the abuser he will be humiliated. If she doesn't leave he will take it out on her. Unless she is willing to at least accept the help, nothing anyone does (short of murdering the abuser) will help her.
 
Superfreak said:
You are scared to death for her safety, yet she is still living with him... that tells me you haven't done enough. A friend would get her the fuck out of that situation... one way or another.
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Seems you hit a nerve there, SF.....the pussy will cry at her murder by this scumbag and convince himself that
he did everything he could......he could at least try hitting the scumbag with his purse or something.

But seriously, the women needs help, counseling to inform her what options she has available to her....there is help out there.
 
NOVA said:
Seems you hit a nerve there, SF.....the pussy will cry at her murder by this scumbag and convince himself that
he did everything he could......he could at least try hitting the scumbag with his purse or something.

But seriously, the women needs help, counseling to inform her what options she has available to her....there is help out there.
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Every day lately I think this board can't get any lower...then I am proven wrong again.
 
WinterBorn said:
Unless she is willing to help herself, all Howey can do is risk being arrested for kidnapping or risk getting her beaten worse.

If someone else confronts the abuser he will be humiliated. If she doesn't leave he will take it out on her. Unless she is willing to at least accept the help, nothing anyone does (short of murdering the abuser) will help her.
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WB, I hear what you are saying regarding the woman having to want to help herself. Let me ask this though, what if this guy has her so scared and so much under a spell that she is literally too frightened to do anything and needs someone to literally get her out of the situation? I'm not suggesting kidnapping the woman is the number one route to take but is there a scenario where it's exactly what the woman needs to get her away from the abuser?
 
cawacko said:
WB, I hear what you are saying regarding the woman having to want to help herself. Let me ask this though, what if this guy has her so scared and so much under a spell that she is literally too frightened to do anything and needs someone to literally get her out of the situation? I'm not suggesting kidnapping the woman is the number one route to take but is there a scenario where it's exactly what the woman needs to get her away from the abuser?
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If that is the case then in all likelihood she will end up going back to him or calling him and telling him where she is.

I am not saying that taking her away from the situation against her will is always a bad idea. I just know that, very often, it creates more problems for her than before, if she is not willing to help herself.

Well meaning men have interferred in numerous domestic abuse situations and the abuser took it out on the victim. It is common enough that people trying to council victims are warned about it.
 
RazorX said:
I can only imagine what happens on a typical Friday in that house.

Husband comes home drunk beats the wife
Neighbors call the cops
Cops show up and see her with marks and bruises and arrest him for domestic abuse.
She goes down to the jail the following day and bails him out, does not files charges because she loves him.

Calls Howey to ask for help and he says sorry, I don't want to get involved.
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If that is what actually happens, then my pity and concern for her gets considerably less.....this is a perfect chance to do something to save herself from the
abuse....she must start defending herself.....must.
 
WinterBorn said:
If that is the case then in all likelihood she will end up going back to him or calling him and telling him where she is.

I am not saying that taking her away from the situation against her will is always a bad idea. I just know that, very often, it creates more problems for her than before, if she is not willing to help herself.

Well meaning men have interferred in numerous domestic abuse situations and the abuser took it out on the victim. It is common enough that people trying to council victims are warned about it.
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I find it difficult to accept that sitting back and basically doing nothing is the best course of option but if that really is the case then so be it. I don't have a female best friend other than my wife so I don't know what that's like. But if my brother-in-law were beating on my sister I wouldn't sit back and take it. Not because I think I'm some tough guy but because I'm not going to watch some guy beat on my sister.
 
cawacko said:
I find it difficult to accept that sitting back and basically doing nothing is the best course of option but if that really is the case then so be it. I don't have a female best friend other than my wife so I don't know what that's like. But if my brother-in-law were beating on my sister I wouldn't sit back and take it. Not because I think I'm some tough guy but because I'm not going to watch some guy beat on my sister.
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I am not saying sit back and do nothing. Be there and tell her she has options. Many, many women endure abuse for years before they decide they have had enough. One of the worst things an abuser does is try to isolate his victim from family and friends. Don't allow that. Stay in her life and give her a choice and a safe place to run if she needs it. Most abusers won't fight a man anyway. they prefer their victims cowering.
 
cawacko said:
I find it difficult to accept that sitting back and basically doing nothing is the best course of option but if that really is the case then so be it. I don't have a female best friend other than my wife so I don't know what that's like. But if my brother-in-law were beating on my sister I wouldn't sit back and take it. Not because I think I'm some tough guy but because I'm not going to watch some guy beat on my sister.
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It's not sitting back and doing nothing. It's being there for that person and not judging them every time they go back to him or take him back. It's hard not to do that, but once you do they will shut down and you will never be able to help them. It's letting them know that when they are ready to leave, you are ready to assist them and give them a safe place to go. They need a lot of counseling.

Of course, it's different if it's your sister. My brothers would put the guy in a hole and he wouldn't be heard from again. I get that. But the problem is not every guy in the world is a tough guy. Not every guy is supposed to be. Not every girl in the world has a brother. Women shouldn't need men to be safe from men. But we all need a support system. It's a really tough situation. There's no easy out. I think people always try to make it a lot simpler than it is. It does sound easy, oh just leave. I once had a fight break out on my fb page about this. One of my friends said she didn't feel sorry for Rihanna because she went back to him so now what ever happens is on her. And another friend of mind got really mad and told her off in the context of her sister coming very close to being killed when she tried to leave her abusive husband. It's not like women get this any better than men. In a lot of cases, they don't. The first thing I think anyone should do if I they have someone close to them in this situation is reach out for professional guidance, counseling, and help.
 
Darla said:
And he tops it.
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Lets see....so far I've stated, (after some sarcasm)
" But seriously, the women needs help, counseling to inform her what options she has available to her....there is help out there"
and in response to "She goes down to the jail the following day and bails him out, does not files charges because she loves him."
I say,
"If that is what actually happens, then my pity and concern for her gets considerably less.....this is a perfect chance to do something to save herself from the
abuse....she must start defending herself.....must. "

causing Darla to have a conniption....

don't she agree that she should be counseled as to what she can do to help herself?
or that while the scumbag is in jail, its an opportunity to at least start a legal action against him before he kills her....
 
I also think some women may hide this from men in their lives. I can't imagine i would tell my brothers. I don't want them to end up in prison. I can see trying to hide it out of fear of the subsequent confrontation/action. I've never been a DV victim, but I can definitely relate to hiding that from your brother. There are things women never tell men. It's just how it is.
 
Darla said:
It's not sitting back and doing nothing. It's being there for that person and not judging them every time they go back to him or take him back. It's hard not to do that, but once you do they will shut down and you will never be able to help them. It's letting them know that when they are ready to leave, you are ready to assist them and give them a safe place to go. They need a lot of counseling.

Of course, it's different if it's your sister. My brothers would put the guy in a hole and he wouldn't be heard from again. I get that. But the problem is not every guy in the world is a tough guy. Not every guy is supposed to be. Not every girl in the world has a brother. Women shouldn't need men to be safe from men. But we all need a support system. It's a really tough situation. There's no easy out. I think people always try to make it a lot simpler than it is. It does sound easy, oh just leave. I once had a fight break out on my fb page about this. One of my friends said she didn't feel sorry for Rihanna because she went back to him so now what ever happens is on her. And another friend of mind got really mad and told her off in the context of her sister coming very close to being killed when she tried to leave her abusive husband. It's not like women get this any better than men. In a lot of cases, they don't. The first thing I think anyone should do if I they have someone close to them in this situation is reach out for professional guidance, counseling, and help.
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Not only women, some men are not capable of street fighting a criminal or any other asshole that bullies those he can overpower....

Thats why we have guns....
 
NOVA said:
Not only women, some men are not capable of street fighting a criminal or any other asshole that bullies those he can overpower....

Thats why we have guns....
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according to zappa, that's just being a bully. using your fists, though, is quite manly and never considered bullying.
 
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