Australian Football

Diuretic said:
My Green Card is in the post!
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I duno, to get a green card you have to answer yes to the following.

Has your porch ever collapsed and killed 3 dogs?

Have you ever gone to a family reunion to pick up chicks?

Do you have at least one car on your lawn on blocks? (drive way doesn't count).

Have you ever said "Honest Your Honor, I was only helping that sheep over the fence."?

If you can answer "yes" to questions like these, you're well on your way to earning a green card.
 
Mottleydude said:
I duno, to get a green card you have to answer yes to the following.

Has your porch ever collapsed and killed 3 dogs?

Have you ever gone to a family reunion to pick up chicks?

Do you have at least one car on your lawn on blocks? (drive way doesn't count).

Have you ever said "Honest Your Honor, I was only helping that sheep over the fence."?

If you can answer "yes" to questions like these, you're well on your way to earning a green card.
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But....I wanted to live in Boston........:eek:

And the sheep thing - well, everyone knows sheep are such bloody liars...:clink:
 
Diuretic said:
Yeah, the cute ones will always blab - tarts :)
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Yea they do....and it can put you on the spot too. When the prosecutor told the Judge that I had been caught fornicating with sheep he said to me....

"That's sick, that's disgusting....aren't you ashamed of yourself?"

I said......

NaAaaaa
 
:D

Of course there's always the Embraceable Ewes :D (the Rams should have kept that name for them....but I suppose New Zealand objected :cof1:)
 
Diuretic said:
:D

Of course there's always the Embraceable Ewes :D (the Rams should have kept that name for them....but I suppose New Zealand objected :cof1:)
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An Ozzie friend of mine was telling me how he was hiking around the back 40 while on holiday in New Zealand when he comes across a Kiwi going hammer and tongs at it with a sheep.

He said it was the most disgusting thing he ever saw in his life so he shouted at the Kiwi. "Oi Mate, where I come from we sheer them first!"
 
Mottleydude said:
An Ozzie friend of mine was telling me how he was hiking around the back 40 while on holiday in New Zealand when he comes across a Kiwi going hammer and tongs at it with a sheep.

He said it was the most disgusting thing he ever saw in his life so he shouted at the Kiwi. "Oi Mate, where I come from we sheer them first!"
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lolololol - now you know why we crutch our sheep :clink:
 
Diuretic said:
lolololol - now you know why we crutch our sheep :clink:
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A bit different attitude here in the states. In Montana some cattle ranchers hired some thugs to kill a sheep rancher who was using the open range. The cattle ranchers were aquited on the unique legal principle that the sheep rancher was better off dead.
 
Mottleydude said:
A bit different attitude here in the states. In Montana some cattle ranchers hired some thugs to kill a sheep rancher who was using the open range. The cattle ranchers were aquited on the unique legal principle that the sheep rancher was better off dead.
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Ouch, unfriendly local jurors no doubt!
 
Mottleydude said:
That happened a long time ago. Cattle ranchers hated sheep ranchers for the damage they did to the grazing lands so they took some frontier justice into their own hands.
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Hang on, I've been to North Dakota, sheep didn't do that damage :eek:

I've been to Montana too (only a small part of it), I would think it could handle a few sheep. I mean, they're smaller than beeves (I read that in a cowboy comic years ago, I still like to use it when possible) so they'd do less damage.

I swear I'm not a member of the Ovine Liberation Front.

Really.
 
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