Going to the beach this weekend

How do you guys feel about disciplining step children? I was watching Wife Swap last night and the guy kept saying, "well I'm the step dad, there's not much I can do about it". Is that the generally accepted stance on step children that its up to the natural parents if they are in their lives to handle discipline or do you think you have just as much authority to discipline as though they were your own kids?
 
LMAO@Lady T

LadyT said:
How do you guys feel about disciplining step children? I was watching Wife Swap last night and the guy kept saying, "well I'm the step dad, there's not much I can do about it". Is that the generally accepted stance on step children that its up to the natural parents if they are in their lives to handle discipline or do you think you have just as much authority to discipline as though they were your own kids?
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You have not even mastered discipling a dog...and hate cats...children are way out of your league!
;)
 
LadyT said:
How do you guys feel about disciplining step children? I was watching Wife Swap last night and the guy kept saying, "well I'm the step dad, there's not much I can do about it". Is that the generally accepted stance on step children that its up to the natural parents if they are in their lives to handle discipline or do you think you have just as much authority to discipline as though they were your own kids?
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My opinion is that it depends entirely on the dynamics of the spousal relationship. If the natural parent is somewhat of a pushover, and not a disciplinarian, the step parent cannot afford to be bad cop to the other spouses good cop routine. Being bad cop is the absolute worst position for a step parent to be in. On the other hand, the step parent does have to exercise some authority; it's a complete cop out to wash your hands of any sort of authority.
 
Battleborne said:
You have not even mastered discipling a dog...and hate cats...children are way out of your league!
;)
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That was actually funny. I'll give you credit for that. It was on topic, you brought in prior topics that were relevent, the sentence structure was good and it made sense. Good for you.
 
Cypress said:
My opinion is that it depends entirely on the dynamics of the spousal relationship. If the natural parent is somewhat of a pushover, and not a disciplinarian, the step parent cannot afford to be bad cop to the other spouses good cop routine. Being bad cop is the absolute worst position for a step parent to be in. On the other hand, the step parent does have to exercise some authority; it's a complete cop out to wash your hands of any sort of authority.
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In my house even when cousins would spend the night, my parents would discipline them like they were their kids. I just always assumed that if an adult was providing for the child they had the 100% authority to discipline them when appropiate. But I see what you're saying. Although if the natural parent isn't going to stick by their spouse its useless. I agree trying ot make the bad cop out of the step parent can definitely backfire.
 
Thanks..............

LadyT said:
That was actually funny. I'll give you credit for that. It was on topic, you brought in prior topics that were relevent, the sentence structure was good and it made sense. Good for you.
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however I don't see this as a kiss and make up moment...but hey all is fair in love and war...and politics...kudos!:tongout:
 
LadyT said:
How do you guys feel about disciplining step children? I was watching Wife Swap last night and the guy kept saying, "well I'm the step dad, there's not much I can do about it". Is that the generally accepted stance on step children that its up to the natural parents if they are in their lives to handle discipline or do you think you have just as much authority to discipline as though they were your own kids?
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I feel I will have to take some part. The boy is too old for much discipline anyway. I will just try to nudge him in the right directions and present a good role model for the most part. With the baby, I intend to be a full equal.
 
RStringfield said:
I feel I will have to take some part. The boy is too old for much discipline anyway. I will just try to nudge him in the right directions and present a good role model for the most part. With the baby, I intend to be a full equal.
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If his mom isn't very effective at discipline then what do youdo?
 
LadyT said:
If his mom isn't very effective at discipline then what do youdo?
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Well, he is a good kid, so she has done okay. Like I said, he is to the point where he is nearly beyond discipline. He is a big enough to make his own choices and he'll have to learn the rest of life's lessons the hard way. So long as he does not get violent or do something that really jeopardizes his own safety, I plan to let him have his leash. I will try to give him advice, and reason with him but...

The only things that have come up so far that I have gotten involved in are...

One night he said he hated his mother. I went into his room and explained how much that sort of thing hurt his mom and how she needs him. I expressed how I knew that from being the child of a single parent. Then i beat the crap out of him. haha j/k

One day he was complaining about how his aunt put the baby on the bed (he's a terrible worrier, get's it from his mom). He basically accused her of being careless. She did not pile pillows around her like he felt she should and his mother may have. Instead she put them on the floor in case she did roll off. I explained to him that even if she did not do it as he thought she should she obviously showed concern in the way she did place the pillows.

Another time he was complaining about chores and I pointed out to him that he was putting in way more effort and energy in trying to avoid the work than the work actually required.

In all these instances he seems to accept what I have said pretty well. Kids are not as unreasonable as some people make them out to be.
 
RStringfield said:
..........

One night he said he hated his mother. I went into his room and explained how much that sort of thing hurt his mom and how she needs him. I expressed how I knew that from being the child of a single parent. Then i beat the crap out of him. haha j/k

One day he was complaining about how his aunt put the baby on the bed (he's a terrible worrier, get's it from his mom). He basically accused her of being careless. ...............
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eh. He seems okay then.

I know for a fact I'd never go out with anyone who had demon children.
 
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