i'm the man

C

Cancel 2018. 3

<-- sched 2, MJ sched 1
had a great thanksgiving....spent amazing quality time with my mom (we lost my brother this past march), stepdad, friends and family....took my wife to many new sites in the city...helped prepped a huge tg dinner, did the dishes afterwards (with wife's help :) )....made the ladies breakfast the day after (croissant, eggs, avocado, lightly melted tillamook chedder, salt pepper to taste)....the men, fuck them, i told them to make their own :pke:

kicked ass at ping pong, won one bowling game, lost the rest...reclaimed chair from the egyptian breed cat that thinks he owns the effing place, kicked ass on PS3 Shift (beat everyone else)....though i sucked at rock band....

made my 94 uncle laugh and honestly laughed at his jokes....what a character, 94 years old, sharp as a tack....lost his wife some 30 years ago, and you know, he is still like the men from his time, a true man....that he thinks i'm funny is quite a compliment, because he doesn't know the meaning of a "polite" or bs laugh or compliment....cool guy

and all you libs who think cons/repubs are rednecks....lol for you....there are plenty of wealthy educated folks that like glenn beck, o'reilly etc.....i couldn't believe how many of my more well to do family watch those shows and honestly are conservative. you don't hear about them because they don't post on boards, they don't protest, they don't whine.....they discuss and vote....

so....how many man points do i get?
 
i'm sure it is....

so studmark....what, besides haranguing your miniscule man muscle in grandma's closet, have you done over the holiday?
 
RAARRRRR I'm a Dinosaur! said:
that's a downer
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it was....but, life goes on, and we all still had fun....i didn't mean that to be a downer, but an uplifter....i hate death, fuck that....but we still had fun, very hard at first, but we did....as my OP states....

if you want to psychoanalyse it, go for it....

i still get man points

what did you do?
 
Well unfortunately you do not receive or lose and man points. I'm glad you had an amazing thanks giving, but the story you told is ho hum. Now if you played PS3 drunk and kicked ass, it might be a different story.
 
My Holiday weekend just took a turn for the worse. My little sisters house burned down this morning. She and my Bro-Inlaw weren't home at the time, so no one was hurt but it and everything inside is a complete ruin. So I'm loading some spare clothes in the car and have as big a check as I can write at the moment in my back pocket. Called my other siblings and between the three of us we can come up with about 5 grand for them. That should get them through till the insurance comes in.

Ya know you rationalize this sort of thing by saying "Well at least no one got hurt, that's what's important." and it is but man losing your home is more than just a material loss.
 
Mott the Hoople said:
My Holiday weekend just took a turn for the worse. My little sisters house burned down this morning. She and my Bro-Inlaw weren't home at the time, so no one was hurt but it and everything inside is a complete ruin. So I'm loading some spare clothes in the car and have as big a check as I can write at the moment in my back pocket. Called my other siblings and between the three of us we can come up with about 5 grand for them. That should get them through till the insurance comes in.

Ya know you rationalize this sort of thing by saying "Well at least no one got hurt, that's what's important." and it is but man losing your home is more than just a material loss.
Click to expand...

wow....my thoughts go out to them
 
CaptBillyTheKid said:
Tell me a story that you'd tell at a bar, that may result in man points.
Click to expand...
My cousin Virgil is a pilot. He was flying a load of sheep to New Zealand across the Pacific when his plane crashed near a deserted Island. The only ones that survived was Virgil, one of the ewes and a border collie they had on board for managing the sheep.

Virgil was stuck on that god forsaken island for a pretty long time and got pretty lonely. One evening he saw the collie and the ewe sitting beside the fire. He sat down next to the ewe, looked at her and smiled. The collie instantly jumped up and growled at him so he moved away. I guess that went on for quite a while. Every time he'd get lonely he'd look at that sheep but the Border Collie would be there in an instant growling at him.

Well I guess this went on for a long long time but one day they finally spotted a ship out on the horizon. Virgil lit a beacon fire but much to his dismay the damned ship started to sink! Only one survivor made it to shore and damned if it wasn't Nancy Pelosi. He pulled her onto the shore and took her to his fire to get warm for which she was most greatful.

So here's Virgil stuck on the dessert island with Nancy Pelosi for quite some time and after a while Nancy starts to get a bit lonely too. So one night at teh fire she say's to Virgil....ya know...we've both been here for a while, were both lonely and we both have needs...ya know....if you're willing to do me a favor, I'll do the same for you and my husband will never find out about it.

Virgil's spirits pick right up and he say's to Nancy Pelosi "Really? You mean that?!". Nancy's eyes get real big and she say's "Certainly."

Virgil get's a great big smile and says "That's great! Would you take the dog for a walk?"
 
CaptBillyTheKid said:
Tell me a story that you'd tell at a bar, that may result in man points.
Click to expand...

actually, i stand by my man points....i had sex done to me for my efforts

it don't get any more manly that and if you don't give me man points, you're just jealous or you're spending to much time on one handed clapping in your grandma's closet
 
man walks into a bar in the high dusty desert plains of california, sits down, orders a cold one.

as he sips the quenching brew, he notices a horse in the corner with a pot of gold next to him. he asks the bartender whats up with the gold, bartender says if you make the horse laugh, the pot of gold is yours.

man walks up to the horse and whispers in his ear. the horse immediately starts laughing and can't stop....the man gets the gold.

he comes back to the bar a year later and sees the same horse with a new pot of gold. he asks the bartender whats up with the gold, bartender says if you make the horse cry, the pot of gold is yours. man asks if he can take the horse out back for a minute, bartender says sure....he comes backs a minute a later and the horse is bawling his head off and can't stop.

puzzled, the bartender asks how he did it...well, says the man, the first time i told him my dick was bigger than his and the second time i showed him
 
UPDATE - for the record:

manly points awarded from cap't are no longer valid, their authority no longer recognized, forever abolished of any meaningful value

do not accept man points from here on out and if you do, it is a sure sign you are not manly
 
Threedee walks into a bar and orders 5 shots of whiskey. Bartender says "Here ya go, what ya celebrating?" Threedee says "My first blowjob". Bartender says "Well congrats! Have a shot on me!" Threedee say's "No thanks, if 5 won't get this taste out of my mouth, another won't help."
 
Mott the Hoople said:
My cousin Virgil is a pilot. He was flying a load of sheep to New Zealand across the Pacific when his plane crashed near a deserted Island. The only ones that survived was Virgil, one of the ewes and a border collie they had on board for managing the sheep.

Virgil was stuck on that god forsaken island for a pretty long time and got pretty lonely. One evening he saw the collie and the ewe sitting beside the fire. He sat down next to the ewe, looked at her and smiled. The collie instantly jumped up and growled at him so he moved away. I guess that went on for quite a while. Every time he'd get lonely he'd look at that sheep but the Border Collie would be there in an instant growling at him.

Well I guess this went on for a long long time but one day they finally spotted a ship out on the horizon. Virgil lit a beacon fire but much to his dismay the damned ship started to sink! Only one survivor made it to shore and damned if it wasn't Nancy Pelosi. He pulled her onto the shore and took her to his fire to get warm for which she was most greatful.

So here's Virgil stuck on the dessert island with Nancy Pelosi for quite some time and after a while Nancy starts to get a bit lonely too. So one night at teh fire she say's to Virgil....ya know...we've both been here for a while, were both lonely and we both have needs...ya know....if you're willing to do me a favor, I'll do the same for you and my husband will never find out about it.

Virgil's spirits pick right up and he say's to Nancy Pelosi "Really? You mean that?!". Nancy's eyes get real big and she say's "Certainly."

Virgil get's a great big smile and says "That's great! Would you take the dog for a walk?"
Click to expand...

Mate of mine was marooned on an island. He was there for ages. Tried making a fire but couldn't find dry kindling. Tried to send messages to no avail. Finally he saw a figure approaching. 'Thank god you have come.'
'Have you been here long?' asked the visitor.
'I've lost count', said my friend.
'I'll see what I can do', said the stranger and walked off the island, stopped the traffic and my friend crossed the road to safety!
 
Mott the Hoople said:
My Holiday weekend just took a turn for the worse. My little sisters house burned down this morning. She and my Bro-Inlaw weren't home at the time, so no one was hurt but it and everything inside is a complete ruin. So I'm loading some spare clothes in the car and have as big a check as I can write at the moment in my back pocket. Called my other siblings and between the three of us we can come up with about 5 grand for them. That should get them through till the insurance comes in.

Ya know you rationalize this sort of thing by saying "Well at least no one got hurt, that's what's important." and it is but man losing your home is more than just a material loss.
Click to expand...
That sucks man.
 
Mott the Hoople said:
My cousin Virgil is a pilot. He was flying a load of sheep to New Zealand across the Pacific when his plane crashed near a deserted Island. The only ones that survived was Virgil, one of the ewes and a border collie they had on board for managing the sheep.

Virgil was stuck on that god forsaken island for a pretty long time and got pretty lonely. One evening he saw the collie and the ewe sitting beside the fire. He sat down next to the ewe, looked at her and smiled. The collie instantly jumped up and growled at him so he moved away. I guess that went on for quite a while. Every time he'd get lonely he'd look at that sheep but the Border Collie would be there in an instant growling at him.

Well I guess this went on for a long long time but one day they finally spotted a ship out on the horizon. Virgil lit a beacon fire but much to his dismay the damned ship started to sink! Only one survivor made it to shore and damned if it wasn't Nancy Pelosi. He pulled her onto the shore and took her to his fire to get warm for which she was most greatful.

So here's Virgil stuck on the dessert island with Nancy Pelosi for quite some time and after a while Nancy starts to get a bit lonely too. So one night at teh fire she say's to Virgil....ya know...we've both been here for a while, were both lonely and we both have needs...ya know....if you're willing to do me a favor, I'll do the same for you and my husband will never find out about it.

Virgil's spirits pick right up and he say's to Nancy Pelosi "Really? You mean that?!". Nancy's eyes get real big and she say's "Certainly."

Virgil get's a great big smile and says "That's great! Would you take the dog for a walk?"
Click to expand...

Fact of the Millenium:

Nancy Pelosi is irrefutable proof that her father screwed Chihuahuas...

UglyChihuahua001.jpg
 
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