Misery loves company ?

uscitizen

uscitizen

Villified User
Ever since I got seperated from my wife, everyone seems to think I need another woman ???
I'm doing great and won't say I will never tie up with another woman, but I am in no hurry and will be pretty picky on which one.
Why do most everyone think you have to have one of the opposite sex, or same sex in some cases with you ?
 
Just have fun USC. When the time comes and you seek a companion you can worry about that then. Personally I prefer to just let things happen. I've never actively sought a person to be with. It just happens.
 
thanks LadyT,
Not a loss from my viewpoint. Yep I am living in a nice little house on a friends farm, rent free, just keep an eye on the place for him, and pay utilities, etc. He had vandalism problems as no one lived there. He is actually a cousin of my estranged wife :)
No one ecept my wifes immediate family blame me. I have gone from fantastic son in law to spawn of satan to them :)
Have even been hit upon by some of the wife's friends (?) ;)
 
IHateGovernment said:
Just have fun USC. When the time comes and you seek a companion you can worry about that then. Personally I prefer to just let things happen. I've never actively sought a person to be with. It just happens.
Click to expand...

thanks IHG, that is the way I look at it too. And I think I am old enough that my brain might control another part of my body better than in years past ;)

I am just curious why most everyone seems to think I need a wife ?
 
Relationships shouldn't be based on needs anyway. They should be based on mutual benefit. When you need another person that puts an undue burden upon them, among adults anyway.
 
uscitizen said:
thanks LadyT,
Not a loss from my viewpoint. Yep I am living in a nice little house on a friends farm, rent free, just keep an eye on the place for him, and pay utilities, etc. He had vandalism problems as no one lived there. He is actually a cousin of my estranged wife :)
No one ecept my wifes immediate family blame me. I have gone from fantastic son in law to spawn of satan to them :)
Have even been hit upon by some of the wife's friends (?) ;)
Click to expand...

Well, I'm glad to see that you're getting along happy and well. I can't help but to feel a twinge of loss when I hear that a marriage is ending. But, at least you don't have to go to church every day of the week!
 
Yeah I sure know that IHG. I was the Husband Mule :(
She was the spender and do what she wanted to do and nothing else one.
Heck it is actually cheaper to pay her maintenance till the divorce is final than being married to her. She can no longer give my money to the church now ;)
 
LadyT said:
Well, I'm glad to see that you're getting along happy and well. I can't help but to feel a twinge of loss when I hear that a marriage is ending. But, at least you don't have to go to church every day of the week!
Click to expand...

Oh I had already resigned as chairman of the trustees and stopped attending church. I just plain did not have time for it. Someone had to wash clothes, do dishes, earn the money, etc

she has of course already promised to change if I will take her back, I told her she had over 7 years to do that and I did not believe her anymore. She has mental issues but is not disabled or anything, just blames laziness and spendthrift on her problems and makes no effort to improve herself. thinks a pill will fix it.


Oh well life is so nice now, Think I will go down to the smokies this weekend.
will be my first mini vacation in 5 years or so.
 
I noticed this when I was in my early 20s. All my friends got married and all were pushing me to get married. Later they had all gone through divorces at about the same time I was getting married and were warning me against getting married. People seem to associate other's happiness with their own misery/happiness.
 
good luck usc

After I got divorced 5 yrs ago thought I'd be single a long time. I met woman where I wasn't even looking. Playing tennis!!
Do things you like to do and you will meet someone with similar interest.
Just get out there when your ready, don't fall into a pattern of moping at home.
 
Topspin said:
After I got divorced 5 yrs ago thought I'd be single a long time. I met woman where I wasn't even looking. Playing tennis!!
Do things you like to do and you will meet someone with similar interest.
Just get out there when your ready, don't fall into a pattern of moping at home.
Click to expand...

Yeah me too after my first marriage. However after 15 years she suddenly changed. Quit a 75K job , 3 yrs from full retirement benefits because it stressed her too much, quit doing anything except what she wanted to do. Got religion, became a clutterbug like her parents, etc. Became a spendthrift, ran thru 35k + about 30K on credit cards in 3 years flying her folks to Florida and taking them to disneyworld and such while I worked and struggled , sold all my stock, etc to avoid bankruptcy. Sometimes people change and not for the better.
7 years of this was enough for me.
She seems to handle stress of managing church projects and such just fine, as long as it is something she wants to do.

Life is good now and I might even get to retire before I die :)
 
Topspin said:
After I got divorced 5 yrs ago thought I'd be single a long time. I met woman where I wasn't even looking. Playing tennis!!
Do things you like to do and you will meet someone with similar interest.
Just get out there when your ready, don't fall into a pattern of moping at home.
Click to expand...

Yeah me too after my first marriage. However after 15 years she suddenly changed. Quit a 75K job , 3 yrs from full retirement benefits because it stressed her too much, quit doing anything except what she wanted to do. Got religion, became a clutterbug like her parents, etc. Became a spendthrift, ran thru 35k + about 30K on credit cards in 3 years flying her folks to Florida and taking them to disneyworld and such while I worked and struggled , sold all my stock, etc to avoid bankruptcy. Sometimes people change and not for the better.
7 years of this was enough for me.
She seems to handle stress of managing church projects and such just fine, as long as it is something she wants to do.

Life is good now , no moping around ,and I might even get to retire before I die :)
 
Damocles said:
I noticed this when I was in my early 20s. All my friends got married and all were pushing me to get married. Later they had all gone through divorces at about the same time I was getting married and were warning me against getting married. People seem to associate other's happiness with their own misery/happiness.
Click to expand...

First of all, boo-hoo to all you men. But you haven't even lived through stupid comments until you've been a single female in your 30's, trust me.

Of course, your second point is absolutely smack on. I actually told a man in his 40's to shut up this week, just two days ago, at work. He was going on to this young guy in his 20's, who just relocated to NY for his work, and was talking about how hard he and his gf were working to get her up here with him. And the married guy in his 40's (who married in his 20's) is telling him, don't rush into that , play the field you have plenty of time, the last thing you want to do is get married. The young guy is obviously in love and it's very sweet.

That's what unhappily married people do though. After spending their 30's being "smug marrieds" (Bridget Jones' Diary) and trying to make everyone not married yet feel like crap, they spend their 40's warning everyone to never get married, their 50's having mid-life affairs, and by the time they hit 60 are either divorced, or stop the affairs and finish their lives with grim acceptance and deep cynicism convinced that anyone who appears happily married are just putting on a show.

Btw, good luck with the new stage of your life USC. When you're ready for it, love will come again, and no matter what anyone says, that is always worth waiting for. It's what makes life so beautiful! In the meantime, being without a partner can be wonderful too.
 
Thanks Darla, good post , and yes the ladies get it too. Most seem to think if you are single there is something wrong with ya, perhaps it is something right ;)
 
uscitizen said:
Thanks Darla, good post , and yes the ladies get it too. Most seem to think if you are single there is something wrong with ya, perhaps it is something right ;)
Click to expand...


Well, I just figure that everyone has their reasons, and they are probably mosty all different reasons, depending on the person and their particular life path.

I'm so picky now Usc, it would be nearly impossible for me to find someone if I broke up with my current bf. I won't even talk to someone who isn't very smart, and very aware, and very well-read. Obviously, I woudn't even be seen with a Republican.

I mean, cute and has a good job just don't cut it for me anymore. So I know where you're coming from. Until someone really special happens along, better to be by yourself and just be yourself.
 
Darla said:
Well, I just figure that everyone has their reasons, and they are probably mosty all different reasons, depending on the person and their particular life path.

I'm so picky now Usc, it would be nearly impossible for me to find someone if I broke up with my current bf. I won't even talk to someone who isn't very smart, and very aware, and very well-read. Obviously, I woudn't even be seen with a Republican.

I mean, cute and has a good job just don't cut it for me anymore. So I know where you're coming from. Until someone really special happens along, better to be by yourself and just be yourself.
Click to expand...
So, you are saying you wouldn't come to the JPP Convention next year?
 
Darla said:
Well, I just figure that everyone has their reasons, and they are probably mosty all different reasons, depending on the person and their particular life path.

I'm so picky now Usc, it would be nearly impossible for me to find someone if I broke up with my current bf. I won't even talk to someone who isn't very smart, and very aware, and very well-read. Obviously, I woudn't even be seen with a Republican.

I mean, cute and has a good job just don't cut it for me anymore. So I know where you're coming from. Until someone really special happens along, better to be by yourself and just be yourself.
Click to expand...

Yep have to be real special on the inside.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top