My last fall semester....

However Rob I asked you not whether it is important but of #1 importance. So apparently this trumps all other concerns.

This is your problem. You put this at the very top of your concerns. I am not telling you to date someone you don't find attractive but I think you also need to include other considerations.

the problem is that the kind of men you are going after know they are good looking and nothing is worse than a man who just knows he is the shit. This explains there poor behavior. The people they primarily enter into relations with are shallow themselves and thus this is what they have come to expect. However people like this are a dime a dozen so they don't place any value in the people seeking them out. Thus you become disposable to them.

I suggest you avoid the type of men who just know they are hot or whatever. Not telling you to find someone you aren't attracted to but look also for someone who is more likely to exhibit the traits you desire. The guy who people go after because of his looks isn't going to be it.

Go after a guy who is good looking but the main reason people are interested in him is his personality, sense of humor, or other internal quality. This facet will have shaped the man into a different kind of person and will be more suitable for you.
 
robdastud said:
nothing is set in stone, and obviously im still very bitter about getting broken up and they couldn't man up and call to tell me and had to read it on their myspace page... but it made me think im probably not going to have a lasting relationship w/ me living at home and in Hartford. its just not going to happen... been trying to make it happen for about 7 years...

plus i don't want to run into el douchebag again i mean i have time, and i am going to weigh out all my options... the thing is also i don't know how i feel about renting an apartment in NYC or anywhere b/c it doesn't give me any equity, but i figure i could do it for a year or 2 then move over the river and buy something... but i could also move to NYC and hate it and end up alone anyways LOL...
Click to expand...


what's this about getting broken up with over myspace??!!!!
 
Cypress said:
That's why you get married to a nice, professionally employed dude. It pretty much takes two incomes ;)
Click to expand...

Yeah. Unless he or I was making beaucoup beaucoup dinero. There's not way you can get something decent out there unless of course you want to live in the desert.
 
IHateGovernment said:
Dump you on a myspace page or any of the other ill things you have said have happened to you.

You know what your problem is Rob? You are attracted to men and men are very difficult to deal with when it comes to relationships. Compared to women men care very little about them and see them as disposable as tissues.

You've got a rough road ahead.

Let me ask you this:

Do you place looks as number one priority when looking for someone?
Click to expand...

All true.
 
robdastud said:
of course... you have to be attracted to them.
Click to expand...


That's true, but you don't have to be attracted by looks. I'm not. I've met guys who I thought were fabulous looking, but once I got to know them, I couldn't even see them as being good looking. And I've met men who I thought were very average looking, very so-so, but had something else once I got to know them that I found very attractive. That was when I was very young. I have never been driven by looks, it's weird maybe, I don't know.

And now that I'm a bit older, the thing that turns me on more than anything is brains. I know what Marilyn Monroe saw in Arthur Miller, it was his big, throbbing brain, but I don't know what she saw in Joe Dimaggio. I would have done Miller in a second if I was around back then.

Brains are very hot. But I've tried to explain that to other people, in person, and they have looked at me very strangely. It doesn't bother me. I actually feel sorry for them.
 
IHateGovernment said:
However Rob I asked you not whether it is important but of #1 importance. So apparently this trumps all other concerns.

This is your problem. You put this at the very top of your concerns. I am not telling you to date someone you don't find attractive but I think you also need to include other considerations.

the problem is that the kind of men you are going after know they are good looking and nothing is worse than a man who just knows he is the shit. This explains there poor behavior. The people they primarily enter into relations with are shallow themselves and thus this is what they have come to expect. However people like this are a dime a dozen so they don't place any value in the people seeking them out. Thus you become disposable to them.

I suggest you avoid the type of men who just know they are hot or whatever. Not telling you to find someone you aren't attracted to but look also for someone who is more likely to exhibit the traits you desire. The guy who people go after because of his looks isn't going to be it.

Go after a guy who is good looking but the main reason people are interested in him is his personality, sense of humor, or other internal quality. This facet will have shaped the man into a different kind of person and will be more suitable for you.
Click to expand...

Yeah, defintely. Without a sense of humor, I wouldn't bother.
 
i don't know if things would be different if or when i have my masters degree.

The US degree system baffles me.

In the UK, a masters is level higher than a bachelor degree, one below a Phd.

Within the bachelor degree you have two disciplines, BA (Bachelor of Arts) and BSc (Bachelor of Science). You are awarded either a first class honours, 2.1, a 2.2 and a third.

How does it work in the US?
 
AnyOldIron said:
i don't know if things would be different if or when i have my masters degree.

The US degree system baffles me.

In the UK, a masters is level higher than a bachelor degree, one below a Phd.

Within the bachelor degree you have two disciplines, BA (Bachelor of Arts) and BSc (Bachelor of Science). You are awarded either a first class honours, 2.1, a 2.2 and a third.

How does it work in the US?
Click to expand...

pretty much the same way: bacchelors, masters, PhD, however class honours are replaced with GPA which is typically on a scale from 0 - 4. I think a 2.5/3.0 is average, 3.0-3.5 is good and 3.5-3.9 is really good, and a 4.0 is a perfect transcript!
 
pretty much the same way: bacchelors, masters, PhD, however class honours are replaced with GPA which is typically on a scale from 0 - 4. I think a 2.5/3.0 is average, 3.0-3.5 is good and 3.5-3.9 is really good, and a 4.0 is a perfect transcript!

The marking system depends on the degree in the UK.

The course I am taking, correspondence BA Hons in Philosophy is a series of papers marked as a %age. For a 1st class honours degree you need to score over 75% grade average. That is not easy to do in arts degrees with no defined answers. Am averaging about 84% after the first 10 papers.
 
I went to city university by Angel station for a year. I did think the UK system was a bit strange. I appreciated it the year I had a mechanics of materials class and I ended up getting a 45 or something ridiculously low on the final. Somehow I ended up with a B. Good ole curve!
 
LadyT said:
He really dumped you on myspace instead of calling? What a jerk!
Click to expand...

yeah i told you when we talked!! LOL. or i thought i did... we had a fight b/c i got ripped that he didn't call on sunday when he said he was going to, after being severely drunk on sat night, having to stay over my house, so drunk i had to pull over on the side of the highway from New Haven to my house something like 5 times for him to throw up, then at my house i had to get him a pan for him to continue dry heaving i was up til 5 taking care of him til he passed out. then the next day when he left he said he would call me later, sunday comes and goes, no call, then labor day no call.. i actually called him at 9 at night, ripped like why didn't you call you said you were gonna call yesterday, he was all like i forgot, i was like well how do you forget to call me? then he said he didn't do anything all day sunday and one of his friends stopped by for only 15 min. i said well if one of your friends can stop by for 15 min then you can call me for 2 to let me know your doing better. then we had a talk the following night and he was all like i dunno i think we're moving to fast blah blah blah... ill call you tomorrow, then i got no call and only discovered we were broken up from him changing his myspace page from in a relationship to single...

and that was that. but i stand by my statement. if you say your going to call someone esp someone your dating, you need to call them, esp after what i went through on sat night w/ him
 
I remember all the rest except the myspace part of it. That was pretty low. I thought you meant he wrote you a letter or something on myspace. It was about to be payback time!
 
im still upset about it, and totally rebounding... LOL but ive stopped visiting their myspace page, and i kinda don't wanna go out to bars around here (and i don't often) b/c i dont' wanna run into them.
 
Brains are very hot. But I've tried to explain that to other people, in person, and they have looked at me very strangely. It doesn't bother me. I actually feel sorry for them.

Couldn't agree more. Looks are nice but what really gets me interested in a woman is her intelligence and sense of humor.

I'm so glad I met my wife. It's nice to be with someone who you can talk about any subject with and they will have at least a fair knowledge of it. Also to make a joke about something and laugh together about it. These things you can still enjoy together when you are 80 wrinkled and flabby.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top