Proper urinal etiquette

Lowaicue said:
Well I'm not skinny. 6'2 and 190lbs. And I have just measured myself and at 16 inches could easily get between the sides. But then, I'm not a yank!

24 inches!!!!! That's FAT, man. That's F-A-T FAT
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16 inches!!

HA HA HA HA HA

You're nothing but a gurl.
 
Mott the Hoople said:
When I was in grad school I was attending a seminar on advanced waste managment methods. During the break I went to the bathroom to take a piss. After I was finished pissing I ziped my pants shut and started to leave. The jerk I was standing next to said to me. "I don't know about you but I'm a michigan graduate and there they taught us to wash our hands after we finish urinating. To which I said "Well I'm a Wright State graduate. There they taught us not to piss on our hands!"
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Old joke.
When I first heard it, it was a graduate from Yale and one from Harvard.
 
Dr. Fetus said:
BTW, guys, this didn't actually happen. Mott is, once again, making shit up, and confusingly doing so with an extremely old and commonly known joke, apparently under the mistaken belief that no one would be able to identify it.
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Yeah but he still doesn't wash his hands.
 
Lowaicue said:
I am more likely to have my arms by my side when seated. Airlines suggest you are fat. On average, seat widths in hard-arse are between 17 and 18.5 inches.
Even smart-arse class (business) it is only 20 - 22 inches. Since few people are likely to stand at a urinal with their arms at their sides for longer than an average flight we must conclude that in the eyes of most people, private and corporate, you are FAT.
STOP eating!
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My arms are at my sides, and inside the partitions, so I can hold myself while I urinate.

Maybe the difference is that you sit down to pee?
 
Low IQ's urinal:

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Damn Yankee said:
You're a disgusting germ spreader. :fu:
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That does it, I must torture you all with this retarded public service ad that's been all over the radio in WA the last couple of weeks. Apparently, when we pull out of our cow or horse or whatever, we're supposed to go wash our hands.

 
Dr. Fetus said:
BTW, guys, this didn't actually happen. Mott is, once again, making shit up, and confusingly doing so with an extremely old and commonly known joke, apparently under the mistaken belief that no one would be able to identify it.
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Well thank you Captain Obvious! Damned kid...send him to school and buy him books, what does he do? Eats paste!
 
PostmodernProphet said:
there is a Chinese restaurant in Grand Rapids Michigan that has metal dividers between the urinals.....these metal dividers are only 24 inches apart.....my shoulders are wider than 24 inches....my only option was to attempt a bank shot.....was that a fail?....
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Proper etiquette at that point is to use one of the stalls where you would normally sit.
 
Mott the Hoople said:
No No No No No!!! That violates Man Law # 268. A man does not squat to pee!
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There's this way you can stand up in front of a toilet that makes it so you don't have to squat. Usually a boy's father shows him this while he is very young. It usually involves lifting the seat.
 
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