I hate to have to agree with this, but you are right. Rather than a way of life, for many it's a super special club only for those personally invited, where you are taught that you are better than everyone else. The compassion taught by Christ is twisted into sneering pity tinged with scorn for those not of the one true faith. If you doubt that, just look at how the ppl on this board who bleat the loudest about their faith use it as a bludgeon rather than an example of a better way.
I've noticed in my many years that those who talk the loudest about possessing something -- their intelligence, their honesty, their money, their sexual prowess, their religion -- are the ones who don't have it at all.