Do married people share money?

Jarod said:
I can see that, but it also can become a control issue. I knew a guy who gave his wife an allowance, but it was for food and bills. She could never buy clothes or anything much for herself until he agreed to give her extra.
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You don't have to have separate money or accounts to see that kind of control. When both people are working and making their own money, it takes some of that control away in that one person can't control all the finances.

The flip side of that is I know a guy whose wife works and all she is supposed to contribute is to pay the electric bill. He just found out it's 3 months overdue. She is always complaining she never has any money but she always has new clothes and knick knacks around the house.
 
Poor Richard Saunders said:
You don't have to have separate money or accounts to see that kind of control. When both people are working and making their own money, it takes some of that control away in that one person can't control all the finances.

The flip side of that is I know a guy whose wife works and all she is supposed to contribute is to pay the electric bill. He just found out it's 3 months overdue. She is always complaining she never has any money but she always has new clothes and knick knacks around the house.
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He's a fucking fool then
 
Jarod said:
I keep hearing about married couples talk about my money and their partners money, and whose money it is.

That’s not how my marriage works.

My wife and I both make money and it goes into a joint account. When we spend on everyday things we don’t consult with each other but if we spend a lot extra or buy a big ticket item we discuss it.

I find it strange when couples live in a way that requires one or the other to ask all the time or use “their own money”.

How do you do it and why?
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as an attorney I have seen too many women who upon the death of their husbands find their credit cards cancelled and zero credit rating......my wife has her own bank accounts, her own credit cards, her own credit rating.......I have the power to write checks on her accounts, she has the power to write checks on mine......I have never looked at her bank statements......I doubt she has ever looked at mine.....when she bought her current car wrote the check......when we bought my current car I paid half and she paid half......
 
Jarod said:
I keep hearing about married couples talk about my money and their partners money, and whose money it is.

That’s not how my marriage works.

My wife and I both make money and it goes into a joint account. When we spend on everyday things we don’t consult with each other but if we spend a lot extra or buy a big ticket item we discuss it.

I find it strange when couples live in a way that requires one or the other to ask all the time or use “their own money”.

How do you do it and why?
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ditto
 
Jarod said:
My multi millionaire friend always says…”Oh I can’t afford that.” When I point out she is a multimillionaire sh says, “Oh, that’s my husband’s money.”
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Heh, sounds like Mr. Owl.

Him: (complains about the poor shave he just did)
Me: What made it bad?
Him: I reused the razor too many times.
Me: Well, then change it.
Him: They cost money.
Me: So? You're a millionaire, you can afford to use a new razor every day!
Him: Well, then I wouldn't be a millionaire, would I?
:rofl2:
 
Jarod said:
I can see that, but it also can become a control issue. I knew a guy who gave his wife an allowance, but it was for food and bills. She could never buy clothes or anything much for herself until he agreed to give her extra.
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Was she okay with that? Relationships are so interesting and so is what we personally would tolerate, and what we wouldn't.
 
ThatOwlWoman said:
Heh, sounds like Mr. Owl.

Him: (complains about the poor shave he just did)
Me: What made it bad?
Him: I reused the razor too many times.
Me: Well, then change it.
Him: They cost money.
Me: So? You're a millionaire, you can afford to use a new razor every day!
Him: Well, then I wouldn't be a millionaire, would I?
:rofl2:
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He sounds a whole lot smarter than you. How did a dimwit like you snag someone with brains? Maybe it's your skills that aren't otherwise obvious.
 
I guess the troll needs another reminder. :laugh:

Today, 10:17 AM
Yakuda
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Interesting. I don't pay much attention to that stuff. We say, "We got paid yesterday" regardless of who got a paycheck that day. :dunno:
 
Hawkeye10 said:
As you might know I am very much "I run my life, you run yours.... I will stay out of your life if at all possible, in return you please stay out of mine"....so I am with you there.
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But when it comes to drag shows or abortion…
 
ThatOwlWoman said:
We're like you and your wife. But when my sister was married, they did their finances that way: Mine, yours, ours. But it gets even weirder. When she wanted to get a new car, she sold her old one to her husband. He had to pay her market price.
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My friend, who had a very controlling husband, was shocked at how much “extra” money she had after the divorce, even though she got half. He was spending about 75% of the money before the divorce.
 
Jarod said:
I keep hearing about married couples talk about my money and their partners money, and whose money it is.

That’s not how my marriage works.

My wife and I both make money and it goes into a joint account. When we spend on everyday things we don’t consult with each other but if we spend a lot extra or buy a big ticket item we discuss it.

I find it strange when couples live in a way that requires one or the other to ask all the time or use “their own money”.

How do you do it and why?
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We are like you, same account, discuss big ticket purchases and investments.
 
Jarod said:
I keep hearing about married couples talk about my money and their partners money, and whose money it is.

That’s not how my marriage works.
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It often is. Many successful marriages operate this way.
Jarod said:
My wife and I both make money and it goes into a joint account. When we spend on everyday things we don’t consult with each other but if we spend a lot extra or buy a big ticket item we discuss it.

I find it strange when couples live in a way that requires one or the other to ask all the time or use “their own money”.

How do you do it and why?
Click to expand...
Usually there is a joint account, then there are two personal accounts for one or both. Whatever is in the personal account they can spend at their leisure without discussing anything. That account is refreshed from the joint account for a regular amount on a regular basis.
Household bills and the like are paid from the joint account. It also includes most grocery and sundry spending, but sometimes that comes from one of the personal accounts instead. Any adjustment to this routine is discussed, just as a big expenditure is.

It's been done. It works.

No one method is 'right' or 'wrong'. It is what that particular couple decides how to do it.
 
Into the Night said:
It often is. Many successful marriages operate this way.

Usually there is a joint account, then there are two personal accounts for one or both. Whatever is in the personal account they can spend at their leisure without discussing anything. That account is refreshed from the joint account for a regular amount on a regular basis.
Household bills and the like are paid from the joint account. It also includes most grocery and sundry spending, but sometimes that comes from one of the personal accounts instead. Any adjustment to this routine is discussed, just as a big expenditure is.

It's been done. It works.

No one method is 'right' or 'wrong'. It is what that particular couple decides how to do it.
Click to expand...

No method is right or wrong... But trying to control a married partner with money is a warning sign for a marriage.
 
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