reverendlionelblair
Junior Member
Voodoo Moon, a film about the end of the world that comes across as a badly done episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer directed by a lazy crack head.
Marie Antoinette - A film about a really interesting time in history that manages to edit out the interesting bits and instead focuses on the tedious shit bits about how Marie Antoinette was a foreign queen (shock) who's husband was a bit useless in the bedroom (double shock) accompanied by a terrible eighties soundtrack that made me want to throw my cassette player out the window. I also put Bobby in this category, though that was a lot better than Marie A, it was still self-indulgent Hollyshite at its most maudlin.
Thin Red Line - totally self indlulgent load of nonsense featuring cameos from half of Hollywood, wanted to throw the director to the sharks.
Notting Hill or anything by Richard Curtis - Load of cliched bollocks about how English peple live in enormous houses and say 'bugger' all the time and everything is constantly twee and there are no ethnic minorities. Combined with terrible cheesey music and the same fucking actors over and over again.
All the Oceans 11/12/13 movies - George Clooney is so cool and overstyled that these films become more like watching an advert for George Clooney and Brad Pitt than watching a film. The trouble is, neither of them are particularly good actors and the whole Oceans thing stopped being cool after the first film, now comes across like watching my dad sing karaoke.
Domino - Worst. Film. Ever. Keira Knightley isnt tough, the director of this film (Tony Scott) is a drooling moron and Entertainment in Video will not be in business for much longer.
Mr & Mrs Smith, The Passion of the Christ and any US remake of a Japanese horror film (Ring, Dark Water, The Grudge) all of these films also deserve criticism for being unfeasibly shite, particularly Ring 2 (US remake) which was like watching a hilarious remake of a Carry On film.
Marie Antoinette - A film about a really interesting time in history that manages to edit out the interesting bits and instead focuses on the tedious shit bits about how Marie Antoinette was a foreign queen (shock) who's husband was a bit useless in the bedroom (double shock) accompanied by a terrible eighties soundtrack that made me want to throw my cassette player out the window. I also put Bobby in this category, though that was a lot better than Marie A, it was still self-indulgent Hollyshite at its most maudlin.
Thin Red Line - totally self indlulgent load of nonsense featuring cameos from half of Hollywood, wanted to throw the director to the sharks.
Notting Hill or anything by Richard Curtis - Load of cliched bollocks about how English peple live in enormous houses and say 'bugger' all the time and everything is constantly twee and there are no ethnic minorities. Combined with terrible cheesey music and the same fucking actors over and over again.
All the Oceans 11/12/13 movies - George Clooney is so cool and overstyled that these films become more like watching an advert for George Clooney and Brad Pitt than watching a film. The trouble is, neither of them are particularly good actors and the whole Oceans thing stopped being cool after the first film, now comes across like watching my dad sing karaoke.
Domino - Worst. Film. Ever. Keira Knightley isnt tough, the director of this film (Tony Scott) is a drooling moron and Entertainment in Video will not be in business for much longer.
Mr & Mrs Smith, The Passion of the Christ and any US remake of a Japanese horror film (Ring, Dark Water, The Grudge) all of these films also deserve criticism for being unfeasibly shite, particularly Ring 2 (US remake) which was like watching a hilarious remake of a Carry On film.
