cancel2 2022
Canceled
- The American woman published the witty and detailed list on Quora
- She praised Brits for their queuing system and sensible 'portion control'
- Wrote, 'they call soccer football because it's clearly played with the foot'
An American woman is sweeping the internet with her highly amusing list of reasons why the Brits do it better.
Ivy Lee, as she is known on Quora, based in Sunnyvale, California, published the list in response to a question on the forum: 'What do the British do better than the Americans?' She reeled off 23 examples in total, praising the UK on everything from its food and music to its £10 note and its plug sockets.
The California-based mum reeled off 23 examples in total, praising the UK on everything from its hearty full English breakfast and good music to its £10 note and its plug sockets
At the top of her carefully composed list was the British language in its purest, un-Americanised form. 'They call hamburger "beef burger" because it's clearly made of beef,' she points out. 'They call soccer "football" because it's clearly played with the foot.'She also praised the full English breakfast, but also remarked: 'They have portion control, resulting in higher life expectancy while we have super-sized everything (because why not?), resulting in obesity (this is why not). Other items on the list include the UK's free healthcare and 28-day paid holiday allowance, compared America's pitiful ten days.
The woman also praised the British accent, its healthcare system and even its lousy weather - for teaching its citizens to 'appreciate the sun'
Even our weather was flipped into a positive. 'They know how to appreciate the sun because though the sun never sets in the British empire, it rarely shines in the motherland,' she wittily remarked. They have Charles Darwin on their £10 note while we are 42 percent creationist. But the final blow to her own lacking patriotism was perhaps saved for last. 'They beat us at politeness and profanity at the same time,' she stated. And, 'the English accent is more attractive than the American accent. This is just an indisputable fact of nature'.
THE LIST IN FULL: 23 REASONS THE BRITISH DO IT BETTER
1. They call hamburger beef burger because it's clearly made of beef.
2. They call soccer football because it's clearly played with the foot.
3. They use the SI system because so does the rest of the world.
4. Their sockets can be switched off because it's easier, safer and more energy efficient.
5. They look at the day first, as in dd/mm/yy instead of mm/dd/yy because for around 30 days in a row, the month is the same as yesterday.
6. They have the full English breakfast while we have the full sugar and preservatives cereal.
7. They have portion control, resulting in higher life expectancy while we have supersized everything (because why not?), resulting in obesity (this is why not).
8. They have nice relaxing afternoon teas with custard cream biscuits while we drown ourselves in Starbucks just to maintain functionality.
9. Their native sports, football, rugby, cricket are adopted internationally while our sports reside mainly in America.
10. They have 28 days of paid holiday by law, not including maternity leave, sick leave, etc. while we have 10.
11. They have free universal healthcare, praised as the best in the world, while we remain the only developed country (out of 33) that doesn't.
12. They have Charles Darwin on their £10 note while we are 42 per cent creationist.
13. They produced Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit, Chronicles of Narnia, Sherlock Holmes while we produced Twilight.
14. They produced Adele, David Bowie, Elton John, Mick Jagger, Coldplay, Radiohead, Muse, Queen, Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin, The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, The Kinks, The Smiths, The Libertines, The Who? (The British), The Faces, The Waterboys, The Buzzcocks, The Sex Pistols, The Clash, The Zombies, The Slits, The Stone Roses, The Cure, The Darkness while we didn't.
15. Their national animal has a full head of mane while ours is bald.
16. They know how to primly and properly queue while we mass frenziedly.
17. They know how to primly and properly apologise, for everything.
18. They know how to primly and properly drive on the wrong side of the road.
19. They know how to appreciate the sun because though the sun never sets in the British empire, it rarely shines in the motherland.
20. They make better and greater varieties of chocolates, cheeses, cakes, alcoholic beverages and dishes with questionable names (bubble and squeak, spotted dick, singing hinnies).
21. They have a greater grasp of sarcasm, irony, self-deprecating humour and also, the entire English language.
22. They beat us at politeness and profanity at the same time.
23. The English accent is more attractive than the American accent. This is just an indisputable fact of nature.
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