Need advice of a moral and legal nature.

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Rune

Mjölner
My 18.5 yr old son walks in the house earlier with a handle of Gordons vodka. He has just suffered a fair sized disapoint meant and apparently this is one of his present coping mechanisms. Long story short, he told me which package store sold him the alcohol and I drove down there to
inform the owner that one of his employees was not performing diligently, since the drinking age is 21 in Mass and liquor sellers are required to
inspect I.D.s.

The owner was so rude to me that I walked out the door without a word and called the ABCC. I am awaiting a call from the investigator.
I have the vodka bottle but am unsure how far to pursue this. Naturaly I don't want to get my son in trouble, but I do want the store punished for
selling booze whithout checking I.D.s.

At first I wanted to help the owner, the idea of going to the police first never crossed my mind, but the gentleman was completely nonreceptive.

Bear in mind that my wife and I are both nondrinkers. I believe alcoholism is a hereditary illness and it is highly likely that the child of two alcoholics are likely to pass on the genes. I do not believe in prohibition but I do think the punishment for drunk driving should be much more severe.

I welcome input form anyone so inclined. Thankyou.
 
Rune said:
My 18.5 yr old son walks in the house earlier with a handle of Gordons vodka. He has just suffered a fair sized disapoint meant and apparently this is one of his present coping mechanisms. Long story short, he told me which package store sold him the alcohol and I drove down there to
inform the owner that one of his employees was not performing diligently, since the drinking age is 21 in Mass and liquor sellers are required to
inspect I.D.s.

The owner was so rude to me that I walked out the door without a word and called the ABCC. I am awaiting a call from the investigator.
I have the vodka bottle but am unsure how far to pursue this. Naturaly I don't want to get my son in trouble, but I do want the store punished for
selling booze whithout checking I.D.s.

At first I wanted to help the owner, the idea of going to the police first never crossed my mind, but the gentleman was completely nonreceptive.

Bear in mind that my wife and I are both nondrinkers. I believe alcoholism is a hereditary illness and it is highly likely that the child of two alcoholics are likely to pass on the genes. I do not believe in prohibition but I do think the punishment for drunk driving should be much more severe.

I welcome input form anyone so inclined. Thankyou.
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You appear to be more angry at the store, instead of your own son.
Did the store force him to buy it?

I agree that the store should be held responsible for the employee not checking an ID; but what about your responsiblity of teaching your son better coping skills.
Your son violated the law, as much as the store did.
I doubt that this is his first time drinking; because most kids don't start off with Vodka.
 
I would have no problem continuing offering the information to the police. That the store sold vodka to someone underage is serious.

But then I would focus on your son. That he wants to use alcohol as a method of coping with disappointment is not something you want to let slide by.
 
dune, you're doing the right thing. imo, both legally and morally.

how was owner rude to you btw? and, i hope you're aware, your son could likely face criminal charges and as an adult, it will be on his record permanently.
 
In terms of specifics, you would have had to be there, but as an example, when I mentioned the incident, he asked to the effect of "well what do you want me to do about it?" To which I responded, "I want you to check I.D.s. His response to this was "I don't need you to tell me how to do my job". It was at that point that I left.

I had expected at least a slightly concilliatory tone.
 
USFREEDOM911 said:
You appear to be more angry at the store, instead of your own son.
Did the store force him to buy it?

I agree that the store should be held responsible for the employee not checking an ID; but what about your responsiblity of teaching your son better coping skills.
Your son violated the law, as much as the store did.
I doubt that this is his first time drinking; because most kids don't start off with Vodka.
Click to expand...

I don't know how much anger towards an adult experimenting with drinking is appropriate. I certainly did it when I was his age.
You are right that he is wrong, but the store's guilt seems greater and more dangerous as well.

As to teaching him better skills, I assure you that I am putting maximum effort into that, and have been, but thankyou for your concern.
 
WinterBorn said:
I would have no problem continuing offering the information to the police. That the store sold vodka to someone underage is serious.

But then I would focus on your son. That he wants to use alcohol as a method of coping with disappointment is not something you want to let slide by.
Click to expand...

Right, but if it means my son facing charges I am not sure I can be responsible for causing him legal trouble.
 
Rune said:
In terms of specifics, you would have had to be there, but as an example, when I mentioned the incident, he asked to the effect of "well what do you want me to do about it?" To which I responded, "I want you to check I.D.s. His response to this was "I don't need you to tell me how to do my job". It was at that point that I left.

I had expected at least a slightly concilliatory tone.
Click to expand...

is there a reason you didn't quote my post? i know you read my posts, yet, you don't respond directly to them.

his response would have pissed me off as well.
 
I think you did the correct thing, 100%. It's the owner/seller that has reason to be worried, and rightfully so.

I believe you taught your son a lesson, too, even if he won't appreciate it until he's older. You showed him what a caring parent does to protect a child, and when you confronted the seller for not obeying the law re: IDs, you also showed your son that someone else's illegal actions won't be tolerated.

Good luck, and fingers crossed that the investigator won't do more than give your son a good talking-to.
 
My thoughts about the owner are that he is stupid, or the guy who claimed to be the owner is a very poor employee.
I actualy have to believe that the owner of a busy liquor store on the Cape can't be that stupid, which is why it is so astounding.
I know if my business acidentaly broke a law, and someone came and told me instead of calling the authorities, I would be grateful and conciliatory, not aggresive and defensive.
 
Rune said:
Right, but if it means my son facing charges I am not sure I can be responsible for causing him legal trouble.
Click to expand...

Would you rather cause him a but of trouble now and perhaps save him from serious problems with alcohol in his future?

Most of the people in my life who have or do have serious problems like to tell stories about how much they would/could drink when they were not yet of legal drinking age. It sets them up for a works of hurt later on. As does using alcohol (or other substances) as a crutch. Pretty soon all they have is their crutch.

Sorry - soapbox topic for me. It sounds as though you're doing the responsible, morally responsible thing. Only you can decide how far to continue. Props to you for taking a stand at all. :)
 
WinterBorn said:
I would have no problem continuing offering the information to the police. That the store sold vodka to someone underage is serious.

But then I would focus on your son. That he wants to use alcohol as a method of coping with disappointment is not something you want to let slide by.
Click to expand...

What about him buying the alcohol as being serious also?
You report the store, the owner gets a hefty fine and an employee is probably going to lose thier job.
What consequence does your son face?
 
Rune said:
I don't know how much anger towards an adult experimenting with drinking is appropriate. I certainly did it when I was his age.
You are right that he is wrong, but the store's guilt seems greater and more dangerous as well.

As to teaching him better skills, I assure you that I am putting maximum effort into that, and have been, but thankyou for your concern.
Click to expand...

How do you know that he didn't have someone buy it for him?
 
christiefan915 said:
I think you did the correct thing, 100%. It's the owner/seller that has reason to be worried, and rightfully so.

I believe you taught your son a lesson, too, even if he won't appreciate it until he's older. You showed him what a caring parent does to protect a child, and when you confronted the seller for not obeying the law re: IDs, you also showed your son that someone else's illegal actions won't be tolerated.

Good luck, and fingers crossed that the investigator won't do more than give your son a good talking-to.
Click to expand...

You talk of an illegal activity on one side; but ignore the illegal activity on the othe side.
By showing "him what a caring parent does to protect a child", isn't that called ENABLING?
 
Dune, if your son is over 18 then he is rightfully entitled to that vodka, as a legal adult.

The American concept of the "adult minor" is the most fucking retarded aspect of our legal system.

And I'm completely serious, and not trolling.
 
Now for trolling sakes, I think all douchebags that support the retarded 21 age limit, even though 18 is the age of adulthood should be taken out in the street and shot in the face. They should not be sexually violated, though, because they are clearly normt mature enough to give consent.
 
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