That's 3...she's going to hit 5 before 10:00...lol
Poor thing. You really should stop giving me these super-highway-sized openings. lol
~~~
A JPP Pocket Guide to ToxicTalk©

after every sentence = "I'm pretending to be happy. You're convinced, right?"
Teacher = Janitor and lunchroom dishwasher
Stalker = Anyone who shows up in the same thread as she does.
Obsessed = What everyone but she is
Sock = Anyone who doesn't slavishly agree with her
Blocked/Ignored = Cyber equivalent of covering eyes with hands but still peeking
Meltdown = The term assigned when she experiences frustration when once again someone successfully mocks her 7th grade antics; used at least once per day (see Projection)
Projection: Frequent assignation of her own characteristics and actions to others (see Stalker, Meltdown, Jealousy)
More Projection, above: "You emailed ____ for help" = What *she* does when someone is handing her her ass as usual
About spinsterhood: "We" = me n the hounds. Example: "We are going to ___" = Me and the dogs are going to ___.
Hobbies: "We're cooking ____ and ____ for us tonight" = Alpo again.
Family: "Husband" = Imaginary and Invisible Man.
Delusions: "We live in an affluent Jewish neighborhood" = Me and the dogs got a little shack with the back door hanging off and a tire in the front by the shanty porch
Exaggeration: "My sister is an attorney who lives in another state" = Who knew party organizer = legal eagle?
Pretend life: "For ___ (insert name of holiday here), we're going to ____" = Me and the dogs gonna sit at home by ourselves again, spiting on the Internet
Jealousy: "You're so jealous of me" = I'm so envious of you I am green as my favorite boyfr.... cucumber