I'll probably regret this since having read through a lot of this topic it's pretty rough but here goes.
There were aspects of the CSA secession that were worthy of consideration and also justifiable constitutional changes in my opinion that would create a legitimate limited government, states rights, term limits, and other economic improvements and localized responsibility, but for anybody to say that slavery and the supremacy of race was not at the heart of the CSA government's focus is only lying to themselves and revising history. In the CSA vice president Alexander Stephen's own words he called the subjugation of blacks and the acknowledgment of their inferiority as the cornerstone of the new government. He laid out a detailed vision of how it was justified. He even, in his own words, acknowledged that slavery was the immediate cause of the war. That doesn't mean that all Confederate soldiers were fighting for what the government and the executive office were fighting for since many common soldiers were fighting for the home, their state, their land, or out of obligation, and yes many fought to preserve slavery since it was a part of the culture and the economy, but for most southerners the institution of slavery was normal and so it wasn't really a focus for many of them as being something that was wrong.
There are historical things about the Confederacy that I agree with and wish we did today, but there are obviously things that the Confederacy pushed for that were clearly wrong, such as slavery and white supremacy. I am a descendent of Confederate veterans. I'm not embarrassed by that fact, it just is what it is. I'd be lying if I said that I don't own things with the Confederate battle flag on it. I'd be lying if I said that i've never ridden in a truck with friends that had a Confederate flag flying from the back of it. That being said i'm not a white supremacist, I don't believe the white race is superior, I don't believe in the "lost cause" movement, and I don't think that communities that want a Confederate statue to be removed from public land, if that's the decision of the citizens of that town, should be ignored. I do think that the Confederacy is part of the south's history and heritage and I do think that there is a way to preserve the memory of Confederate soldiers and the southern way of life in a way that is respectful and appropriate, but at the same time we shouldn't be willfully ignorant. Calling people "n*****s" and boy and other phrases of obvious racism along with downplaying the relationship between the CSA government and slavery does far more harm to the memory of the soldiers and their families that many of these monuments are built for than it helps. You soil their memory when you promote that sort of hatred and racist language and you stain the flag that you claim you are defending even more in my opinion. If you want to protect history, if you want to protect heritage, then you can't revise it to fit an alternate history, you have to be truthful about it. I can praise the courage of the thousands of Confederate soldiers that went off to war and also praise their families for enduring their absence or loss., but I can also acknowledge that many of their views on race were wrong and not something that I will defend.