What Song Are You Listening To, Right Now?
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charver
You lookin' at my pint?
Embarrassment. Terrible thing it is.
I suppose everyone gets embarrassed by something or other. A social faux pas, such as breaking wind in the middle of a funeral service, innocently enquiring "when it is due" to a fat lass or the constant scourge of public incontinence can cause the face to redden in all but the most robust individuals. Gentlemen often become somewhat "reluctant" when forced to stand between two taller gentlemen in a urinal or on the odd occasion he has naked dealings with a young lady who is still conscious. And who here hasn't shrunk like a salted snail as one comes to the conclusion of an elaborate tale only to see an equal amount of contempt and pity in the doctor's eyes as he holds aloft the x-ray depicting three tins of baked beans in one's rectal passage.
Whatever it is that causes you to freeze in shock as the pallor grips one's face, spare a thought for the members of the British National Party, some say BNP, others say filthy Nazi scumbags. Some ex-Nazi has, perhaps in a fit of pique, decided to leak the entire membership list on the good old internets. It has caused a right stink and no mistake. The BNP fuhrer, Nick Griffin, has claimed this is the work of "the Liberal elite". Hmmm, now where have i heard that phrase before?
"With the publication of this list i fear people will find out i'm a race-baiting monster", said Mrs Bridges, a primary school councillor, 54, Mid-Glamorgan.
Anyway, being the nosey-parker i am, i had a scrat through the list of some 13,000 names just to see if i knew anybody on it. Thankfully, none of my friends are Nazis after all. And neither am i, which i was most pleased about. Rather surprisingly the list contained some details of members occupations and, even more surprisingly, most of the members weren't actually policemen. Somewhat oddly there were a couple of vicars on there but when you sit down and think about it, blokes who hold a grudge against the Jews, like to dress up in black and tell people what to do would seem to be a perfect fit for such a right-wing political shambles such as the BNP.
'What a Thug About' - Beanie Segal
I suppose everyone gets embarrassed by something or other. A social faux pas, such as breaking wind in the middle of a funeral service, innocently enquiring "when it is due" to a fat lass or the constant scourge of public incontinence can cause the face to redden in all but the most robust individuals. Gentlemen often become somewhat "reluctant" when forced to stand between two taller gentlemen in a urinal or on the odd occasion he has naked dealings with a young lady who is still conscious. And who here hasn't shrunk like a salted snail as one comes to the conclusion of an elaborate tale only to see an equal amount of contempt and pity in the doctor's eyes as he holds aloft the x-ray depicting three tins of baked beans in one's rectal passage.
Whatever it is that causes you to freeze in shock as the pallor grips one's face, spare a thought for the members of the British National Party, some say BNP, others say filthy Nazi scumbags. Some ex-Nazi has, perhaps in a fit of pique, decided to leak the entire membership list on the good old internets. It has caused a right stink and no mistake. The BNP fuhrer, Nick Griffin, has claimed this is the work of "the Liberal elite". Hmmm, now where have i heard that phrase before?
"With the publication of this list i fear people will find out i'm a race-baiting monster", said Mrs Bridges, a primary school councillor, 54, Mid-Glamorgan.
Anyway, being the nosey-parker i am, i had a scrat through the list of some 13,000 names just to see if i knew anybody on it. Thankfully, none of my friends are Nazis after all. And neither am i, which i was most pleased about. Rather surprisingly the list contained some details of members occupations and, even more surprisingly, most of the members weren't actually policemen. Somewhat oddly there were a couple of vicars on there but when you sit down and think about it, blokes who hold a grudge against the Jews, like to dress up in black and tell people what to do would seem to be a perfect fit for such a right-wing political shambles such as the BNP.
'What a Thug About' - Beanie Segal
charver
You lookin' at my pint?
Ahoy-hoy Little Joe, Big Fat Hoss and, last but not least, Lorne Greens.
What's that you say? "Has he lost his mind" i hear you whisper behind a concealing hand. To you i say "Pah", in the manner of a particularly haughty Frenchman. I know what i'm doing and that is making a very protracted introduction to what is goin' on in the streets of this fair Queendom. Today we welcome a government sponsored financial Bonanza. See what i did there? (i did say it was protracted, didn't i?)
Yes, it is officially Financial Stimulus Package Day. Why thank you, "Merry Financial Stimulus Package Day to you too".The Great Leader, Gordon Browns, is expected to slash, slash, slash prices with a massive 2.5% cut on VAT, some say sales tax, from 17.5% to a low, low, low 15%, or as many people remember, back to what it used to be.
According to Mr Browns this cut is going to entice the good people of Britain into the nations bazaars, boutiques and emporiums to spend, spend, spend. What thrifty housewife or hen-pecked husband could resist the prospect of this massive giveaway? You'd have to be a fool not to take advantage of a whole penny off a tin of tomato soup or dog food. Why just the other day i was eyeing up a completely pointless purchase but, on glancing at the £19.99 price tag, i found it hard to justify spending such an amount on a luminous plastic elephant. However, should i be strolling past my local plastic elephant outlet and espy a price tag of, say, £19.49, i should not be confident of controlling the urge to splurge. I have splurged on elephants before, you know, and have the newspaper clippings to prove it.
Look at my beautiful elephant and it's beguiling trunk. You want it don't you? You want to touch it? Well it is mine, all mine you hear?
A household buoyed by the jaunty presence of a moderately sized polyurethane pachyderm AND a warm self-satisfied smugness from the knowledge i have single-handedly saved the country's economy from ruin. A win-win situation all round. Until after the next election when we're all to be taxed at 98 pence in the pound and have our houses repossessed by a banking sector whose appetite has failed to be sated by a constant diet of tax-payer hands.
'The Capitalist and the Communist Fight For Our Hero's Affection' - The Muttering Retreats
What's that you say? "Has he lost his mind" i hear you whisper behind a concealing hand. To you i say "Pah", in the manner of a particularly haughty Frenchman. I know what i'm doing and that is making a very protracted introduction to what is goin' on in the streets of this fair Queendom. Today we welcome a government sponsored financial Bonanza. See what i did there? (i did say it was protracted, didn't i?)
Yes, it is officially Financial Stimulus Package Day. Why thank you, "Merry Financial Stimulus Package Day to you too".The Great Leader, Gordon Browns, is expected to slash, slash, slash prices with a massive 2.5% cut on VAT, some say sales tax, from 17.5% to a low, low, low 15%, or as many people remember, back to what it used to be.
According to Mr Browns this cut is going to entice the good people of Britain into the nations bazaars, boutiques and emporiums to spend, spend, spend. What thrifty housewife or hen-pecked husband could resist the prospect of this massive giveaway? You'd have to be a fool not to take advantage of a whole penny off a tin of tomato soup or dog food. Why just the other day i was eyeing up a completely pointless purchase but, on glancing at the £19.99 price tag, i found it hard to justify spending such an amount on a luminous plastic elephant. However, should i be strolling past my local plastic elephant outlet and espy a price tag of, say, £19.49, i should not be confident of controlling the urge to splurge. I have splurged on elephants before, you know, and have the newspaper clippings to prove it.
Look at my beautiful elephant and it's beguiling trunk. You want it don't you? You want to touch it? Well it is mine, all mine you hear?
A household buoyed by the jaunty presence of a moderately sized polyurethane pachyderm AND a warm self-satisfied smugness from the knowledge i have single-handedly saved the country's economy from ruin. A win-win situation all round. Until after the next election when we're all to be taxed at 98 pence in the pound and have our houses repossessed by a banking sector whose appetite has failed to be sated by a constant diet of tax-payer hands.
'The Capitalist and the Communist Fight For Our Hero's Affection' - The Muttering Retreats
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Minister of Truth
Practically Perfect
What It's Like - Everlast
charver
You lookin' at my pint?
This week i have been shocked. Shocked i tells you.
Not the type of shock one gets from touching things after visiting an acquaintance who has invested in sub-standard carpeting, rather the type of stop-in-your-tracks shock which, i imagine, one would feel when making the discovery that one's grandmother was heavily "in to" the scat scene. I wonder if the bin men will take a glass coffee table?
Anyway, we have been told by our great leader, Gordon Browns, that he has not only saved Britain from a terrible fate but has been using his spare time to save the world. What a nice man, eh? Gordon is confident that the best way to solve the problem of government and citizens having borrowed lots and lots of money they have no means of paying back is for government and citizens to borrow lots and lots of money that they have no means of paying back. Everybody in the world can see the logic in this approach.
Apart from those pesky Germaniacs.
The German Finance Minister, Peer Steinbrucks, called Gordon's Kenysian masterplan of ineffectual tax cuts and capital spending - "crass". Gordon said he was just saying that because he was a Social Democrat trying to get one over on their coalition partners, the Christian Democrats, and that he was probably just jealous. See, a simple explanation. Until someone from the Christian Democrats came out and said that Gordon was "a complete cocking piss weasel"*, stating, "The tremendous amount of debt being offered by Britain shows a complete failure of Labour policy. They've bollocksed up their own country and now they want us to listen to their great new plan? He can suck my big fat German balls"**
Luckily the money men know a good plan when they see one, being among the first to recognise the opportunities available in sub-prime lending and early 90's technology companies, and have shown faith in Gordon's scheme by running away from Sterling like it has just told them it was pregnant.
A treasury spokesman defended the government's borrowing, claiming - "If we don't borrow a billion billion billion of money, we need to invest in large capital projects, some people will be made unemployed and the unemployed don't vote you know. Did i say that last bit out loud?", before going on to announce a delay in government orders of two massive aircraft carriers.
'I'm Not Crying. You're Not Crying, Are You?' - Dear and the Headlights
*possibly a mistranslation
**possibly another mistranslation
Not the type of shock one gets from touching things after visiting an acquaintance who has invested in sub-standard carpeting, rather the type of stop-in-your-tracks shock which, i imagine, one would feel when making the discovery that one's grandmother was heavily "in to" the scat scene. I wonder if the bin men will take a glass coffee table?
Anyway, we have been told by our great leader, Gordon Browns, that he has not only saved Britain from a terrible fate but has been using his spare time to save the world. What a nice man, eh? Gordon is confident that the best way to solve the problem of government and citizens having borrowed lots and lots of money they have no means of paying back is for government and citizens to borrow lots and lots of money that they have no means of paying back. Everybody in the world can see the logic in this approach.
Apart from those pesky Germaniacs.
The German Finance Minister, Peer Steinbrucks, called Gordon's Kenysian masterplan of ineffectual tax cuts and capital spending - "crass". Gordon said he was just saying that because he was a Social Democrat trying to get one over on their coalition partners, the Christian Democrats, and that he was probably just jealous. See, a simple explanation. Until someone from the Christian Democrats came out and said that Gordon was "a complete cocking piss weasel"*, stating, "The tremendous amount of debt being offered by Britain shows a complete failure of Labour policy. They've bollocksed up their own country and now they want us to listen to their great new plan? He can suck my big fat German balls"**
Luckily the money men know a good plan when they see one, being among the first to recognise the opportunities available in sub-prime lending and early 90's technology companies, and have shown faith in Gordon's scheme by running away from Sterling like it has just told them it was pregnant.
A treasury spokesman defended the government's borrowing, claiming - "If we don't borrow a billion billion billion of money, we need to invest in large capital projects, some people will be made unemployed and the unemployed don't vote you know. Did i say that last bit out loud?", before going on to announce a delay in government orders of two massive aircraft carriers.
'I'm Not Crying. You're Not Crying, Are You?' - Dear and the Headlights
*possibly a mistranslation
**possibly another mistranslation
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I was going to write some long winded piece of humor, but alas I have been told I am without humor and very much an "Engineer" by somebody who I don't respect at all and has no bit of competence to rely on. I mean, just the other day she was telling me how much it wasn't "rocket surgery" to be able to "program switches". (true story).
Def Leppard - Rocket
Def Leppard - Rocket
Minister of Truth
Practically Perfect
Sophia Ellis Bextor - Murder on the Dance Floor
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_Nsi05HkXw"]YouTube - Murder on the dancefloor-SOPHIE ELLIS BEXTOR[/ame]
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_Nsi05HkXw"]YouTube - Murder on the dancefloor-SOPHIE ELLIS BEXTOR[/ame]
FUCK THE POLICE
911 EVERY DAY
Good video:
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdrCalO5BDs"]YouTube - Radiohead - All I Need (Official MTV Video)[/ame]
C
Cancel5
Guest
Nutcracker
Dixie - In Memoriam
New member
Vide Cor Meum - Danielle DeNiesse and Bruno Lazzaretti
Hallelujah - Jeff Buckley
Hallelujah - Jeff Buckley
C
Cancel5
Guest
Thanks! New artists, I love it!
Dixie - In Memoriam
New member
You're welcome, and it is some beautiful music.
Vide Cor Meum is a mini-opera based on Dante's "La Vida Nuova", and is widely known from the theme music of the movie Hannnibal. I'm not a huge opera fan, but that song is breathtaking.
Hallelujah is a Leonard Cohen song, a friend of mine does a beautiful rendition of it, which is how I was turned on to it.
P
prata
Guest
I have a notice that says I should become part of the community now. I'll start light. 
The Lamentation of Princess Zhao Jun -- Unknown Singer (Mandarin, not Cantonese)
The Lamentation of Princess Zhao Jun -- Unknown Singer (Mandarin, not Cantonese)