Dear ChristieFANNY
It is such a terrible disappointment that you will not agree to letting me visit you in America !
I am now planning to be in the states probably latish May or June (I was told that is a better time of year to go)- so you still have time to reconsider your decision (?)
I mean, if I do not have an American friend like you to advise me when I am in the states, I could end up straying, unwittingly, into some dangerous parts of US. I could end up being raped (i.e "bum-jacked") by a female, trannie truck-driver, or even bludgeoned to death for wearing my red MAGA cap in a place I did not realise was full of Democrat extremists!! ! If something like this happened, ChristieFANNY, how would you ever live with the guilt of knowing you could have saved my life !! ??
On the other hand, we could have lots of fun...
For instance, when I got there you teach me all about ,Tasso, and the other famous poets you studied in College (or after college).
And, you could teach me all about real-life America and how to talk with an American accent ;and I could show you how to speak genuine
"Strine" (that's we Aussies call our own accent) so you could impress your friends.
Also, we could hold hands in the Cinema and "McDonalds"
PLUS, I give expert
"Nuru Massages", so I would be able to give them to you if you wanted (all
strictly therapeutic, of course).
I don't mind cats, so maybe I could even stay at your pad in the states? That would mean I wouldn't have to pay a fortune for a room in "Trump Tower" like I was planning to do. At night I could sleep in your bed. I mean, I would stick
strictlyto the far right/left - hand side of the bed, and you could sleep on the other side. In other words, I guarantee there would be absolutely no "wandering hands" under the covers or any other kind of "monkey business." to worry about !! As you are aware ,CF, I
AM a passionate Romantic, like Shelley, and that's 100% true; but Shelley was only ever really interested in
Platonic love - you know,
"higher -love" (spiritual love) He would have agreed that having physical sex as a means to gratify lust was primarily an exercise in "bumping uglies" as we say in the 21st-century - (i.e. "bumping uglies" - like
Phantasmaldoes with her miniature, pet, "Pot-bellied Pigs.") Speaking of "Phantasmal", I am reminded (for some reason ?), that Shelley had sex with a prostitute once when he was in his youth, and after the experience he said - in a poem he wrote about the incident - that he felt spiritually traumatised. His soul, he said, had be poisoned by a wicked seductress who had perverted/degraded the meaning of love into the filth of base , carnal hedonism).
I have exactly the same attitude here as Shelley, ChristieFANNY ! I mean, if Taylor Swift and Tomi Lahren (the blonde, "FOX NEWS" anchor), both magically appeared in my bedroom right now - both completely naked !!- and they each gave me a smouldering, slow wink and beckoned me toward themselves with their index fingers, I would not"batt an eyelid". What I
would do is say: "Ladies, would you both kindly remove yourself from my apartment immediately - the front exit is over there to the right. You are both exposing yourselves in an unacceptably disgraceful and indecent manner - and if you do not leave this minute, I will have you both charged with "Moral Turpitude" by the local Constabulary ! In other words,, Shelley I are both "Gentlemen" (in the Regency sense of the word), ChristieFANNY. That is, just like the Gentlemen you read about in Jane Austin's novels, such as, "Mr Darcy." (in "Pride and Prejudice"). Those guys never, ever got up to any sordid or "creepy" stuff like groping, squeezing and/or tweaking their lady companions' bosoms, booties or
"Hoo-Hars". They would rather die than acquire a reputation for engaging in such lewd and unchivalrous behaviours! (And) that's precisely what I'm like too, ChristieFANNY.
There is only one exception in the case of Shelley that comes to mind. He is said to have arrived once at a Regency - era Ball in the beautiful English city of Bath. The Ball was held in the "Assembly Rooms" in the city centre. I have visited them myself, they have been preserved exactly as they were in Shelley's time during the Regency (1811 to 1820). In fact, the city of Bath is like a giant Georgian time capsule (stunningly graceful and elegant); it is quite simply England's most beautiful city. The Regency Balls were held during the social "season" in 18th and 19th century, England, which ran from about July to October of each year. These dancing, and fancy dress, balls were strictly private - invitation only - affairs. Care was taken to ensure that no common folk or
riff-raff were invited; only young women and men (and their families) from the ranks of the nobility, the landed gentry, the very wealthy and other members of elite, English social classes/("polite society") were eligible to receive invitations to attend.
During Shelley's time the young women who attended the Balls were dressed in exquisite, flowing satin and lace evening gowns. The fashion at the time was for low-cut (often "square"-shaped necklines, and the girls all wore "staye" or "corsets under their dresses. The corset were used to support anf lift their bosoms. The corsets also had a length of whale -bone or wood stitched into the front of the corset called a "busk." A "busk" was shaped like a large ruler, and the upper end of it pushed the lady's bosoms apart creating a deep cleavage. The corset and it's busk pushed the lady's breasts up and also separated them so that they looked like two firm oranges placed next to each other. With their, plunging, low-cut neck-lines (just covering each nipple) these evening gowns were no doubt a "turn on" for the Regency males attending a society ball.
On one occasion Shelley was invited to a Ball - (he was the son of a Baronet - Sir Timothy Shelley, and so he "made the cut" for an invitation) - which was being held in London, (I think). He was known as a poet at the time among the upper class in England,and accepted as a literary man (even though he had already gained a bad reputation among "High Society" in England for promulgating radical, anti-establishment political viewpoints, such as : "The Necessity of Atheism"' strident calls for the abolition of the institution of marriage, and the universal practice of "free love." (Shelley held the same doctrine of "free love" as the Hippies and the student counter-culture on American College campuses did in the 1960s).
So Shelley arrived at this ball. Regency Balls that were held in the (social) "season" of each years were the epitomy of high romance, they were held in beautiful ballrooms typically lit by 1000 or so candles hanging from splendid crystal chandeliers. Everything about these Balls was like an essay in sublime: refinement, grace and good (aesthetic) taste. This didn't mean there not elderly society spinsters present to keep on eagle eye on the behaviour of the young couples as they flirted and danced with one another. The elders watched the action going on around them through "quizzin'" glasses", these were monacles held atop a thin rod of wood that magnified the object that they were held toward. If there was any suspicion of "frisky" behaviour taking place - like improper touching/kissing - the "quizzin'"glasses" would be held up to investigate it, and, if necessary, the alarm would then be raised (!). There were very strict protocols that governed behaviour at these Balls - young men and women were forbidden from doing the kind of things they might do at a large social gathering in the US in 2024 ( which- let's face it - often tends to involve getting drunk and then screwing the "day-lights" out of each other in the grass outside, Right?? To continue. What Shelley did, on the occasion I'm referring to, was to "order" a group of about 20 young, attractive women at this Ball to form a straight line by standing shoulder to shoulder , next to each other on the wooden, dance floor. He then announced, very solemnly, that news of a dreadful new contagious illness in the local district had reached him and that it could be detected in women by the presence of certain changes in the normal texture of the "tissues of the bosom". Shelley then passed from one ("low-cut") girl to the next ("low-cut") girl along the line, thoroughly kneading and squeezing each one's breasts as he moved down the line. At the end of his "examination" Shelley announced an "all clear", and somehow managed to get away with the whole stunt !
Actually, ChristieFANNY, there is a similar story from Founding-era America starring, George Washington. When he and his Continental Army defeated the British Army, Washington was celebrated as a Great Hero and adored by the American people. He was invited to guest of honour at umpteen high - society social events Eye-witness sources say that when Washington was seated at a dinner table opposite attractive (and buxom) young women, he had an impulsive habit of reaching across the table and fondling/kneading their breasts. No one present, including the girls, dared say anything that might offend America greatest hero !! What do you think of that, ChristieFANNY ?!!
Actually, I shouldn't say to you that I am a Regency -era "Gentleman"
LIKE Percy Shelly, because Shelley's behaviour was very often precisely the opposite of what was expected during his times. His conduct was often extremely selfish and callous, especially toward Mary, who suffered so much grief on sorrow on his account it is scarce believable that she endured. Also Shelley's first wife , Harriet, ended up drowning herself in London, due to his cruelty. If you were a young woman during the Regency, getting mixed up in a romantic affair with Percy Shelley would be the biggest mistake you ever made in your life. It would be like "holding hands" with a giant tornado.
Shelley is the great lyric poet in the English language. But the man and his poetry were two quite different things. Having read (I think) every serious biography that has been published about him (in the English language) my theory is that Percy Shelley suffered from a mood disorder that must have been a condition like BIPOLAR (Bipolar Affective Disorder), where the sufferer cycles been MANIC phases (high states of mind, that are characterised by an increased rate, intensity and level of mental activity in general: reasoning/cognitive, emotional), and DEPRESSED PHASES (low states of mind, lethargy, dysphoria/negative affect, sluggish cognition, unhappiness, loss of motivation/ enthusiasm, etc) I think that Shelley wrote his most famous poetry/prose when he was in a manic or hypo-manic state of mind My diagnosis might be right, or it could just as equally be totally incorrect.Though I'm not the first modern reader of Shelley's "life and works" to have suggested he displayed the clinical symptoms of what modern psychiatrists refer to as BIPOLAR DISORDER. One thing I can say for certain is that Shelley's mind was not normal - in fact, it was very
ABNORMAL, psychiatrically speaking.
So, ChristyFANNY, I'm a Regency gentleman who happens to live in the modern - day, 21st -century, West ! That means I am extremely polite and well-mannered and conduct myself with the utmost propriety when I am in the company of the fairer sex (unless they insist that I do not !!
Therefore you would have nothing to worry about if you met up with me in the states - I do not have "wandering hands" and I would never put the "hard word" on you for a "quick session in the bushes" ( if you know what I mean). I find that kind of behaviour utterly appalling.
Just think of all the fun we could have, CF. We could play cool board games like "Scrabble" and "Monopoly" at your place for hours on end ! We could hold hands at the cinema (like I mentioned) watching romantic movies, or stay home at your place and watch Barbara Streisand classics on Netfix, like: "The Way We Were." You could "show me off" to all of your American, liberal, girl-friends as your male buddy who is a real Aussie.
Plus, I would not discuss my admiration for Donald Trump with you (or any of your liberal buddies) nor would I bore you with the philosophy of political Conservatism, or wear my red MAGA cap in your presence ( or my "Trump 2020", black campaign T-Shirt (now a highly sought-after collectors' item), that has a giant, US Eagle in flight, on the front, and the words: "MAKE LIBERALS CRY AGAIN", printed under its talons).
So, given all of the above, what have got to lose by allowing me to visit you at your home in the states, ChristieFanny. Nothing that I can think of; in fact, you would probably have lots and lots of FUN. Right ? !!
This POST is "SWALK": loveu:
XXXX
Dachshund - the WONDER HOUND
DLM....Dachshund Lives Matter !!
