So when you said "I have a couple well placed baseball bats, a plethora of knives and a variety of other "items" stashed throughout my home", what you actually meant was you have a knife on top of a bookcase or two?
And when you asked Billy "Do you have children? I find it hard to believe, if you've got guns within arm's reach literally everywhere in your house, that it's safe for young children.", what you actually meant was "Do you have children who are tall? I find it hard to believe, if you've got guns within arm's reach literally everywhere in your house, that it's safe for tall children."?