The United Kingdom Explained

Since the 15th Century, however, the English have dominated The French in every way possible, so they have more than made up for the humiliation.

:britf:
 
BAN HAMMER said:
Except the Normans weren't French. They were Viking settlers. They hadn't even been in NORMANDY for a century. And France was hardly France at the time, seeing as the Burgundians existed.
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My little detour into the ridiculous was not intended to be historically accurate. I guess that's where yanks get it all wrong, you know like believing that they won the second world war and believing that the US is/was the best nation in the world because they believe their own propaganda.
Once again I would recommend Jon Stuart to those Americans who, like yourself, lack the ability to smile ... particularly at themselves.
Still, don't lose any sleep over it, old chum. There are greater things to concern you, I'm sure. Did you fix the wheel on your new house yet?
 
Lowaicue said:
My little detour into the ridiculous was not intended to be historically accurate. I guess that's where yanks get it all wrong, you know like believing that they won the second world war and believing that the US is/was the best nation in the world because they believe their own propaganda.
Once again I would recommend Jon Stuart to those Americans who, like yourself, lack the ability to smile ... particularly at themselves.
Still, don't lose any sleep over it, old chum. There are greater things to concern you, I'm sure. Did you fix the wheel on your new house yet?
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Funny enough my automobile needs new ball joints and is without wheels. Low, why is it when I try to simply have a nice historical discussion with you, that you must take a personal offense to it.

As for WWII, are you implying that we LOST the war? It wasn't a draw, and if we didn't win....
 
King of Owls said:
can someone tell me how the welsh are different from the english? I get the scotts being separate, get the irish. Don't know shit about the welsh though.
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The Scottish and Welsh are both Celtic peoples. The English are mostly descendents of immigrant Germans (England literally meaning "land of the Angles", Angles being a tribe that lived in modern Germany just south of Denmark), with the native Celtic Bretons being driven out or assimilated. There is an independent Welsh and Scottish language, although practically nobody speaks either anymore except for the sake of doing so, besides perhaps some sheep farmers in the Scottish isles who are still waiting on electricity.

For the sake of completeness, the Cornish (basically the southwest peninsula of England) are technically a separate Celtic peoples as well, and have their own language which is even less used than Scottish or Welsh. Theoretically, I suppose, this is a separate "country" as well, although soverighnist movements aren't as strong there and support for actual Independence is probably non-existant.
 
BAN HAMMER said:
Forgot about the Saxons.
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The Normans were essentially just a French ruling elite that eventually became assimilated into wider anglo-saxon culture after Frenchness became unpopular due to the hundred year war. They never really had the large-scale immigration of the Germans. It reminds me, in a way, of how the Manchus have ironically lost their independence by conquering China. A significant minority doesn't maintain a unique identity in a unified country for long, be they rulers or subjects.
 
Paranoid Android said:
Since the 15th Century, however, the English have dominated The French in every way possible, so they have more than made up for the humiliation.

:britf:
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More like the 19th. France was pretty much the strongest country in europe for most of this period (with perhaps some competition from the Spanish empire, although that was well into decline by the 17th century), because they were the biggest unified block after the Pope essentially destroyed the HRE in the 12th century, and therefore divided the Germans (who are otherwise the largest nationality) . Of course, France went into a decline after Napoleon, the British empire was at its height with near complete control of India and expansions into Africa (who needs America anyway?), and the Germans eventually got their act together, replacing France as the biggest unified power on the continent, disrupting the balance of power, which culminated in the clusterfuck known as the 20th century.
 
BAN HAMMER said:
Except the Normans weren't French. They were Viking settlers. They hadn't even been in NORMANDY for a century. And France was hardly France at the time, seeing as the Burgundians existed.
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France was kind of weak around the time, true. I suppose you're thinking of the maps in the early part of EUIII, where Burgundy is a huge ass power. Burgundy was technically a subject of the French king, although at one point in time the Duke of Burgundy tried to get around that by having the HRE revive the ancient throne of Lotharingia (which was a kingdom in between West and East Francia), making him independent of France once and for all. He creeped the emperor out and eventually died, though, and then I think the French king married his daughter or something, putting the troublesomely powerful duchly firmly under the control of the crown.

France and the HRE both came from largely the same political structure. Both had huge disintigrations in the power of the central authority in the middle ages. The disintigration was actually worse in West Francia, i.e. France, with power essentially devolving to the county level, whereas it only devolved to the duchy level in the HRE. However, centuries of clever stewardship by French kings resulted in them obtaining near absolute power by the 17th century. The HRE, on the other hand, largely fell apart into a loose confederation, mainly because of the chaos caused by several papal crusades, and the fact that, unlike the Capatians in West Francia, no HRE dynasty was ever able to do away with the troublesome German institution of an elective kingship. This naturally put the emperor at the whims of the electors, IE the dukes, who were therefore in a prime position to bargain for more authority for themselves in exchange for election, further contributing to the disintegration of the country.
 
Waterfart said:
The Normans were essentially just a French ruling elite that eventually became assimilated into wider anglo-saxon culture after Frenchness became unpopular due to the hundred year war. They never really had the large-scale immigration of the Germans. It reminds me, in a way, of how the Manchus have ironically lost their independence by conquering China. A significant minority doesn't maintain a unique identity in a unified country for long, be they rulers or subjects.
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That is not strictly true, there was a fascinating series on TV recently about the Normans and I was surprised to hear of their influence in Southern Italy.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Norman_conquest_of_southern_Italy
 
Lowaicue said:
Until comparatively recently the whole country was known as England and it was only the modern penchent for an imagined independence that brought us to this state. I'm told (but have not read the book) that Winston S Churchill's tome The History of the English Speaking Peoples referred to the entire nation as England.
Of course we haven't always been England. We were invaded by the frogs in 1066 and subsequently our crown ruled over parts of Frogland and our official language (until the 14C) was Frog. Prior to the invasion by Norman the Bastard we were constantly being invaded by Germanic and Scandinavian tribes known as the Vikings. The latter, not trusting the woad covered and simple Brits, brought all their own furniture. No examples now exist since they found that each flat pack had a part missing and therefore had to be discarded.
We were several countries then, Northumbria, Mercia, Wessex to name but three. It was King Athelstan, the son or grandson of Alfred the Great (who did not burn cakes) who first united England and had we had a better internet connection at the time we probably could have better organised ourselves against the frog hoardes.

It was the discovery of oil in the North Sea that brought nationalism to the fore.
I actually KNOW some Scots and I take delight in sharing their pride by congratulating them for living in Englands largest county. Whether they are pleased or annoyed at this is difficult to say since their accents are so marked that one can only wonder that they know each others names.
Of course Scotland is named after the invaders from the northern part of Ireland, the Scotus who ran the Picts of town. S Johnson, in his dictionary entry for 'oats' describes it as a food that is grown for and fed to horses but which is eaten by the people in Scotland. Sums it up really.
When we were young, teachers and parents told us to dot all our 'i's and to cross all our 't's. Failure to do this results in the language of Wales and the Welsh. The Welsh sing a lot and, it is said, form rather strong relationships with their sheep. The Welsh tend to be a dark and swarthy race with much facial hair, dark eyebrows and luxuriant moustaches. The Welsh men lack beards.
Ireland is best left to its own devices and periodically, throughout history, their population is culled for their own good.
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With assholes like you around, no wonder the Scottish want to take all of the oil for themselves instead of sharing it with ungreatful douches in the south who still think they're owed something for, I dunno, conquering and oppressing their ancestors or something.
 
Mercia, Wessex, etc... were all German nations. They were all geographically contiguous as well, so it's not surprising that they formed into one mega-nation of douches, England.
 
Perhaps Wales, NI, and Scotland should all just secede, and England should become an American state like it wants to and stop dragging the rest of the country down.
 
Of course, we won't allow them to actually be an independent state called "England", we'll force them to become part of Texas, a condition to which I'm sure the English would readily agree in exchange for getting American penis stuck up in their ass like they so want to. They will also be forced to declare their national language as "American". Eventually, though, Scotland will conquer European Texas with their oil money, and America still won't give a fuck about European Texas even though it's a state, and Scotland will force everyone in southern Scotland/the occupied territory of European Texas to speak Scottish Gaelic. The Scottish will still speak English, though.
 
Waterfart said:
Of course, we won't allow them to actually be an independent state called "England", we'll force them to become part of Texas, a condition to which I'm sure the English would readily agree in exchange for getting American penis stuck up in their ass like they so want to. They will also be forced to declare their national language as "American". Eventually, though, Scotland will conquer European Texas with their oil money, and America still won't give a fuck about European Texas even though it's a state, and Scotland will force everyone in southern Scotland/the occupied territory of European Texas to speak Scottish Gaelic. The Scottish will still speak English, though.
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Are you suffering from insomnia again?
 
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