The Official So Anyway Thread

[Cancel 2020.2]

So anyway, if I defecated in the woods, and no one saw me defecate, did I ACTUALLY defecate in the woods?

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

So anyway, if I defecated in the woods, and no one saw me defecate, did I ACTUALLY defecate in the woods?

The SAME goes for the llamas.............

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

So anyway, on the ONE hand, I DO occasionally like to surf a particular porn site. On the OTHER hand, I will NOT tell you what sometimes gets ON that hand.

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

So anyway, on the ONE hand, I DO occasionally like to surf a particular porn site. On the OTHER hand, I will NOT tell you what sometimes gets ON that hand.

My motto is NEVER shake hands with a guy who looks like he most likely likes to surf porn. A LOT.

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

My motto is NEVER shake hands with a guy who looks like he most likely likes to surf porn. A LOT.

To say NOTHING of the anchovies.

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

To say NOTHING of the anchovies.

PLEASE say NOTHING of the anchovies. Thank you.

 

[Hawkeye10]

So anyways......I have fence that needs fixing......I have had three people come out and look at the job......none have been interested, 2 never bid...#3 changed his mind.

I really dont want to do this myself, I am no spring chicken, the last time I did this repair on this fence the job sucked because it was not built right....

Plus there is the matter that I am lazy.

FUCK ME

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

So anyways......I have fence that needs fixing......I have had three people come out and look at the job......none have been interested, 2 never bid...#3 changed his mind.

I really dont want to do this myself, I am no spring chicken, the last time I did this repair on this fence the job sucked because it was not built right....

Plus there is the matter that I am lazy.

FUCK ME

Oh, boy. Maybe you can just MOVE, so you wouldn't have to worry about the fence. I kid, I kid! I'm also getting VERY tired, it's almost 1:30AM here. I'll try to hang on for a bit more.

 

[Hawkeye10]

Oh, boy. Maybe you can just MOVE, so you wouldn't have to worry about the fence. I kid, I kid! I'm also getting VERY tired, it's almost 1:30AM here. I'll try to hang on for a bit more.

WHAT A TROOPER!

I have still a good 4 hours before I even make an attempt at sleeping....me and sleep have a really crappy relationship now.

I know that it is mostly my fault.

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

WHAT A TROOPER!

I have still a good 4 hours before I even make an attempt at sleeping....me and sleep have a really crappy relationship now.

I know that it is mostly my fault.

So anyway, here's a Henny Youngman joke that has always made me laugh. "This very attractive woman came up to me one night after I had done my comedy routine. She said she really liked me, and said for 40 bucks (This IS an old joke, that 40 bucks today would probably be about 400.) I could take her home, and she would do anything I wanted her to do. So, when we got to my place, I told her, "Paint my house". It wasn't mentioned if the fence was included.

 

[Hawkeye10]

So anyway, here's a Henny Youngman joke that has always made me laugh. "This very attractive woman came up to me one night after I had done my comedy routine. She said she really liked me, and said for 40 bucks (This IS an old joke, that 40 bucks today would probably be about 400.) I could take her home, and she would do anything I wanted her to do. So, when we got to my place, I told her, "Paint my house". It wasn't mentioned if the fence was included.

My wife found this today....we have had Newfoundlands all of our marriage.....if you know Newfs you will get it:

A German Shepherd, Doberman and a Newfoundland have died.

All three are faced with God who wants to know what they believe in.

The German shepherd says: "I believe in discipline training and loyalty to my master."

"Good," says God. "Then sit down on my right side. Doberman, what do you believe in?"

The Doberman answers: "I believe in the love, care and protection of my master."

Ah," said God. "You may sit to my left."

Then he looks at the Newfie and asks, "And what do you believe in?"

The newf answers: "I believe you're sitting in my seat."

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

My wife found this today....we have had Newfoundlands all of our marriage.....if you know Newfs you will get it:

A German Shepherd, Doberman and a Newfoundland have died.

All three are faced with God who wants to know what they believe in.

The German shepherd says: "I believe in discipline training and loyalty to my master."

"Good," says God. "Then sit down on my right side. Doberman, what do you believe in?"

The Doberman answers: "I believe in the love, care and protection of my master."

Ah," said God. "You may sit to my left."

Then he looks at the Newfie and asks, "And what do you believe in?"

The newf answers: "I believe you're sitting in my seat."

Ha-ha! Good one, thanks. And that's it for me tonight, I'll "see" you on here tomorrow night. It was fun this evening.

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

So anyway, Happy June 24th, everyone!

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

So anyway, Happy June 24th, everyone!

And DON'T forget to tip your bartenders..............

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

And DON'T forget to tip your bartenders..............

OR you waiters and waitresses!

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

OR you waiters and waitresses!

NOT to mention the llamas..............

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

So anyway, if two people from Holland go to a restaurant, who picks up the tab?

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

So anyway, if two people from Holland go to a restaurant, who picks up the tab?

Trick question. They BOTH do, each paying for their OWN bill, because they ALWAYS go Dutch Treat.

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

Trick question. They BOTH do, each paying for their OWN bill, because they ALWAYS go Dutch Treat.

And please don't even THINK about bringing the llamas into THIS scenario.

 

[Cancel 2020.2]

And please don't even THINK about bringing the llamas into THIS scenario.

Because they NEVER pay the portion of THEIR bill.